The Ohayou Files
by Yue-chan and Mik-chan
Summary: Umm...this is a mix of just about every anime there is, and is quite funny. Read it and see for yourself.
1. Episode One: Welcome to Girard

Episode One: "Welcome to Girard, PA"   
  
(One day, for reasons known only to her, Mik-chan bashes Miroku to Kingdom Come.)   
  
(Unfortunately, her aim is a little off . . . . )   
  
Miroku: *Doppler effect * HEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeellllllp . . . (He lands in Girard, PA.) What the . . . . MIKOMI! WHERE THE HELL AM I?!   
  
Yue: YAY! (Runs in and hugs Miroku.)   
  
Mik-chan: *Sadistic Grin of Death* Simple . . . .   
  
Miroku: *gets glomped* GAH!   
  
Mik-chan: You're exactly where I want you . . . . OHOHOHOHOHOOOOO!   
  
Miroku: O.o; Eep . . . .   
  
Yue: ^.^ Hiya! (Hugs Miroku.)   
  
Miroku: Um . . . ok then . . . hugs are good . . . . *thinks* Who the hell IS this chick?!   
  
Yue: *grins evilly*   
  
Miroku: Um, hello, miss . . . . I didn't catch your name?   
  
Yue: ^.^ Yue. (Miroku pours on the charm, that lout.)   
  
Miroku: *gets down on one knee*   
  
Yue: -.- Don't even ask it, monk.   
  
Miroku: Yue-sama . . will you please bear my child?   
  
Yue: *hits Miroku on the head*   
  
Mik-chan: He HAS to, you know?   
  
Miroku: @.@ Ite . . . .   
  
Yue: Come on, time for you to babysit the devil children for that. *drags Miroku into the house*   
  
Miroku: NANIIIIIIIIIII?! MIK-CHAN! TASUKETEEEEEEEEEE!   
  
Mik-chan: Help you? (Calmly sits back with her popcorn.) Why should I help?   
  
Yue: Haden! Herb! New play toy for you! (yooc: these kids really are devils, they brought me a deer carcass once.)   
  
Fluffy: This is shaping up to rather entertaining, ne?   
  
IY: O.o; A WHAT?!   
  
Yue: A deer carcass.   
  
IY: o.o; Eek . .   
  
Yue: (ties Miroku up and lets the boys drench him in pink paint) Wheeeee! Fun fun!   
  
Mik-chan: Are these kids or animals? Or can't you tell?   
  
Yue: Kids . . . at least, I'm pretty sure they are.   
  
Miroku: WHY MEEEEEEEE?!   
  
Yue: Because NO ONE asks me to bear his child and gets away with it.   
  
Mik-chan: That and we love to watch you SUFFER! *Evil Grin of Death* OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOOOO!   
  
Miroku: Mik-chan . . . kirei . . . darling . . . get me outta here . . . onegai?   
  
Mik-chan: (matches Aoshi record for stoicism) Nope.   
  
Miroku: (gets a blob of paint in the eye) I HATE YOOOOOUUUU!   
  
Yue: (turns chair to tv and puts in a tape of Barney) Here Miroku, watch this. (Miroku starts writhing and screaming and foaming at the mouth.)   
  
Miroku: NOOOOO! NOT THAT! ANYTHING BUT THAT! WAAAAAAAAAAAH! I WANNA GO HOOOOOOOME!   
  
Yue: (watches the boys getting out cooking utensils and feels a bit of pity) No, you two cannot cook the monk.   
  
Miroku: O.o; COOK THE MONK . . . . . ?!   
  
Yue: Don't worry, I won't let them. They made too much of a mess the last time. *evil grin*   
  
Miroku: O.o; LAST time?! *hollers desperately to the southeast* MIK-CHAN, PLEASE! I'M BEGGING YOU! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLP!   
  
Mik-chan: *grins just as evilly* No, I don't think I will . . . . (Luckily, the boy's parents choose this moment to arrive home.)   
  
Yue: Oh look, saved by the parents. Come on Miroku, I have other plans for you. You still have to meet my sisters. I have seven of them, and one is bound to say yes to your question. *evil grin*   
  
Miroku: *tears tears tears* I wanna go HOME . . . . . (Gets dragged outta the room.)   
  
Yue: *big cheesy grin* Why's that, Miroku?   
  
Miroku: *sobbing* Because, you're worse than Mikomi!   
  
Mik-chan: -.-* Say WHAT now?   
  
Miroku: Well, she is!   
  
Mik-chan: Oh, I don't think so . . . I think the threat of castration by vegetable peeler is about as evil as you can get . . . especially since all my veggie peelers are dull and rusty at the moment . . . MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAA!   
  
Yue: O.o; Yikes, that IS evil!   
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ Hai!   
  
Yue: (feels sympathy for Miroku) Don't worry, I won't hurt you . . . much.   
  
Miroku: -.-; I'm so sure . . . .   
  
Yue: Honest I won't! Can't say anything for the twinling though... or my cats.   
  
Mik-chan: This is a good time for a happy song! *starts singing the theme from 'Love Hina'*   
  
Yue: Speaking of happy, I don't suppose you've got Tasuki over there at the moment?   
  
Mik-chan: Nope . . . Saja's got him for the weekend. However . . . (drags Kouji out from behind the Magical Couch of Hidden Stuff) . . . I have one of my own. ^.^   
  
Yue: ^.^ KOUJI!   
  
Kouji: Aw, HELL no! You're gonna drag ME into this now, too?   
  
Mik-chan: Why not?   
  
Yue: Hey, where's Kouga? (Pouts.) I want my youkai!   
  
Mik-chan: Kouga? Oh, he's . . . (feels a familiar glomp on her backside) . . . -.-* Right . . . behind me . . . . *vein pop poppity pop pop pop* HENTAAAAAAIIIIIIIIII! (Bashes Kouga to Kingdom Come . . . also known as Girard, PA.)   
  
Yue: ^.^ YAY! (Ties Miroku up and glomps Kouga.) Now I have two people to play with!   
  
Kouga: O.O; WHAT THE F- . . . .   
  
Yue: Hiya sweet thing! (Smiles charmingly.)   
  
Mik-chan: *swat* Watch your language, damnit, there's children present . . . somewhere or other . . . I think.   
  
Kouga: O.o; What the hell is goin' on here?!   
  
Yue: (pouts) You don't wanna play with me? (Starts to cry.)   
  
Kouga: -.- Stop that . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: *SWAT SWAT SWAT* BAD! BAD DOGGIE!   
  
Yue: (cries even louder) Kouga doesn't like me! WAAAAAAH! (Kouji seizes the opportunity to sneak away.)   
  
Kouga: Ow . . . OW! *bellows* OKAAAAAAAAAAY! (Hugs Yue-chan.) There, ya happy?   
  
Yue: (stops crying) YAY! ^.^ (Glomps Kouga.)   
  
Kouga: *scowls at Mik-chan* I HATE you . . . .   
  
Mikomi: HURRAY! HE HATES ME! No more Wolf Boy glompage! WAI WAI WAI WAI WAI! (Promptly launches into her Happy-Happy-Joy-Joy Song and Dance.) Happy happy, joy joy, happy happy, joy joy, happy happy, joy joy, happy happy, joy joy, happy happy, joy joy, happy happy, joy joy, happy happy, joy joy joy! ^.^   
  
Yue: (points to Miroku and Kouga) Both of you, on your feet. We're going shopping. NOW! (The boys leap to their feet at once.)   
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ Are they well-trained, or WHAT?   
  
Yue: Yes, they are Mik-chan! (Ties a leash to both of them.) don't think about escaping either   
  
Miroku: -.-;   
  
Kouga: -.-;   
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ Hehe . . . . (Smiles proudly.)   
  
Yue: (stops and thinks) Well, maybe we'll go shopping later. Right now you two can clean out my swimming pool, it's been all winter since its been done. *evil grin* (The D-town bishies go -.-; Yue tosses Miroku and Kouga into swimming pool.)   
  
Miroku and Kouga: *glub glub glub*   
Yue: Hey, Mik-chan, is Chiriko still in the hamster ball?   
  
Mik-chan: Yep! He's gonna be there for the duration of the series, I think.   
  
Yue: ^.^ Sweet! (Turns to Miroku and Kouga.) Had enough yet, you two?   
  
Both: YEEEEEEEEEEESSS!   
  
Yue: Well, I'm not done yet . . . and least, I'm not done with Kouga.   
  
Both: WAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!   
  
Miroku: Oh, wait a minute . . . YAY!   
  
Kouga: -.- K'so . . . .   
  
Yue: ^.^ Miroku gets to meet my sisters . . . .   
  
Miroku: O.o; Eep!   
  
Yue: Don't worry, they're nicer, 'cept for the twinling. Kouga... you get to stay with me.   
  
Both: o.o;   
  
Kouga: -.- Imagine my joy . . .   
  
Mik-chan: *swat* Bad . . .   
  
Kouga: (growls) ONE OF THESE DAYS, MIKOMI, I SWEAR I'M GONNA . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: (leans over slightly so that her plunging neckline is clearly displayed) You'll what, Kouga?   
  
Kouga: O.O I'll . . . I'll . . . eep! *nose bleeds like a fire hose*   
  
Mik-chan: That's what I thought.   
  
Yue: *light bulb* HEY! I know, let's all play dress up! {yes, I'm **, but hey, why not torture them?}   
  
Mik-chan: Hmmm . . . . sounds evil and nasty . . . .   
  
Yue: You like the idea?   
  
Mik-chan: (whips out her nail polish and makeup and several horribly frilly pink dresses) I am SO in! *evil grin*   
  
Yue: Yoush-a!   
  
Mik-chan: *dangerously evil grin* Come on, boys . . . let's play . . . .   
  
Miroku and Kouga: O.O;   
  
Yue: (pulls out her own dresses and makeup) I'll do Miroku!   
  
Miroku: *hentai grin of extraordinary caliber You will?   
  
Mik-chan: *SMACK SWAT TRAMPLE KICK BITE GOUGE* BAD MONK! BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD!   
  
Miroku: @.@ ite . . . . .   
  
Yue: (shouts for the cats) Here kitty kitty kitty! (Several cats come out and tear Miroku up.)   
  
Kouga: *hackles raise* YIKES!   
  
Yue: *to Kouga* Sit!   
  
Kouga: (kisses floor) WAAAAAAH . . . . . why me!   
  
Yue: ^.^ Good wolf-boy! (Pets Kouga's head like a dog.)   
  
Kouga: I HATE you . . . . ALL of you!   
  
Yue: (pouts) You...hate..me...? *giant tears forming*   
  
IY: BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA(rolls around, pounding the floor with one hand, laughing so hard that he cries)   
  
Yue: (starts howling like a fire engine) WAAAAHHHHH! AND I LIKED YOU!!!!   
  
Kouga: I HATE EVERYBODY! WHY SHOULD YOU BE ANY DIFFERENT?!   
  
Mik-chan: *holding her ears* BECAUSE, YOU NIMROD, IF YOU'RE NOT NICE TO YUE-CHAN, I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!   
  
Kouga: *also holding his ears* WHAT?   
  
Yue: WAHHHHHHHHH! (Pounds Kouga's head.)   
  
Mik-chan: (pulls out the veggie peeler and gestures to Kouga, then to the peeler, then to the relevant portion of his anatomy)   
  
Kouga: O.O; EEP! (Hugs Yue-chan like his life depends on it . . . which it kinda does.)   
  
Yue: (turns to Miroku) *snif* you don't hate me, do you? (Smacks Kouga.) Sit down, wolf-boy!   
  
Kouga: *THUD*   
  
Miroku: -.-; Is there any answer I can give that would not bring more blunt force trauma down upon my cranium?   
  
Yue: Yes, there is, Miroku, sweetie.   
  
Miroku: *tears* WHAT IS IT, THEN?!   
  
Yue: (smiles) Say you like me but DON'T ask me to bear your child.   
  
Miroku: WHATEVER YOU WANT, JUST KEEP THOSE FRILLY PINK DRESSES AWAY FROM ME!   
  
Yue: Say you like me first.... and help me dress Kouga up.   
  
Miroku: (bows reverently) I humble myself before you, O Goddess . . . the most beautiful creature to ever grace this unworthy planet . . . . and I think Kouga-kun would look simply DARLING with purple toenails!   
  
Mik-chan: O.o; OK, Miroku . . . you've succeeded in scaring the hell outta me . . . .   
  
Yue: Hmmm... I was thinking neon pink. What do you think Mik-chan?   
  
Mik-chan: I dunno . . . purple would be good too . . . WHY NOT BOTH! ^.^   
  
Yue: (gets out nail polish) Better idea! Purple nails, pink lacy dress.   
  
(Miroku discreetly slips away to the hallway where he giggles himself to tears at the thought of Kouga in a dress.)   
  
Yue: (turns to Miroku) Miroku, sweetie, mind getting me a lemonade?   
  
Miroku: Yes, madam, I hear and obey. (Runs off to get the lemonade. Pops his head back in a second later.) Sugar? Ice? Small paper umbrella?   
  
Yue: Yes, please! Anything for you, Mik-chan?   
  
Mik-chan: -.-* Oi, he never does this for me . . . .   
  
Yue: Poor Mik-chan . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: I think I'll settle for a vodka martini . . . except that I can't drink . . . -.-* chikushou . . . . .   
  
Yue: Yikes. Coffee, tea, anything? I have a large selection.   
  
Mik-chan: (looks hopeful) Peppermint tea?   
  
Yue: Yes I have that! Miroku, get a peppermint tea as well.   
  
Miroku: Yes, mistress. *scampers off*   
  
Mik-chan: Girl, you're scaring me . . .   
  
Yue: I have talent, what can I say?   
  
IY: Whoo . . hehehe . . . . (Looks up from the floor very briefly, sees the dress intended for Kouga and promptly falls over laughing again.)   
  
Yue: Well, its not finished, but lets see if it fits, ne? (Holds up pink dress with yards of lace on it.) Yes, I think this turned out very nicely.   
  
Kouga: GAH! (Struggles violently against the chains which have appeared out of nowhere.)   
  
Yue: Oi! Miroku, hurry it up!   
  
Miroku: (hurries back into the room with a tray) Gomen nasai . . . had to wait for the tea.   
  
Kouga: O.O;;;;;;;;;;;; Mgjdmgndmgmm mghfmrfmrmfdnhmsnde!   
  
Mik-chan: What's that Kouga?   
  
Kouga: (yanks the duct tape off his mouth) I said, "I F**KING HATE YOU!"   
  
Yue: (hits Kouga) No foul language, Wolf-boy   
  
Kouga: @.@ Ow . . . .   
  
Yue: (holds dress up for Miroku to see) What do you think? I think its missing something, but I can't say what...   
  
Miroku: Needs bows, I think . . . yes, lots of little pink bows.   
  
Yue: AH! Yes, pink bows! Miroku, please make some bows for the dress.   
  
Miroku: Yes, my lady. (Sets to work, tying and sewing.)   
  
Kouga: MIROKU YOU TRAITOROUS SONUVABITCH!   
  
Mik-chan: (bashes Kouga with a mallet) BAD!   
  
Yue: Hey, he made the right choice, you made me cry   
  
Kouga: *grumble grumble* I hugged ya, didn't I?!   
  
Yue: So, what good is a hug if you shout at me and say you hate me?   
  
Kouga: -.-; . . . . . . . . .   
  
Yue: (hugs Miroku) The monk on the other hand, he flattered me and called me a goddess and such, so of course he deserves to be forgiven.   
  
Miroku: *sticks his tongue out at Kouga from behind Yue-chan's back* Nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh . . .   
  
Yue: Are the bows finished yet?   
  
Kouga: -.-**** Teme . . . . .   
  
Miroku: Yes indeed, my goddess! (Bows deeply and present Yue-chan with a basket of pink bows.) Is 9000 enough, my queen?   
  
Yue: Yes, that's enough, sweetie. Thank you! (Hugs Miroku and pins bows to the dress.) Now what do you think Mik-chan.   
  
Fluffy: Mik-chan cannot answer at the moment, as she is currently rolling around on the floor laughing hysterically.   
  
Yue: Thank you Fluffy. Pray tell, does anyone else from the Ghetto Bus want to join us? (Entire GB cast goes into hiding faster than you can blink.)   
  
Mik-chan: (regains her feet) Hmm, let's see . . . (Rubs hands together gleefully.) . . . who else can we torture?   
  
Yue: *to Miroku* hope you know how to make dresses!   
  
Miroku: *who has never lifted a needle in his life* O.o; I'll . . . do my best . . . .   
  
Yue: (huggles da monk) That's all I ask for.   
  
Miroku: *starry happy eyes* Awww . . . *blush*   
  
Mik-chan: -.-; That's new expression on the monk . . . and quite frankly, it scares me . . . .   
  
Yue: (ignores Mik-chan's ramblings) Hmm... Maybe I am getting to him? *to Miroku* We'll need more lace, too. Get it from the closet please.   
  
Miroku: Yes, my love . . . . (Trips off to the closet for more lace.)   
  
{We need to use this for a story or something . . . think of all the people it would scare!}   
  
[WAY ahead of ya, sister . . . . ]   
  
Yue: (looks at Kouga and holds up dress) I wonder if we have any jewelry to go with it . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: *suddenly trippy* La . . . I think I shall sing my happy song! (Unbearably kawaii-genki-happy Love Hina theme music suddenly blares from her computer's speakers and Mik-chan begins to warble, more or less on key.)   
Yane no ue de sora o aogu, hizashi wa uraraka.   
Miageru sora, karadajuu genki ga minagitteku.   
THAT'S SO WONDERFUL! Ikiterunda!   
Yamerarenai, akirameru da nante.   
Tohou ni kureta kinou ni sayonara   
Futsufutsu to wakiagaru kono kimochi   
Nando demo yomigaeru, hana o sakaseyou.   
Omoi dewa itsumo amai nige basho   
Dakedo tachi kire, asu o ikiru tame   
Shukufuku no toki wa kuru, te o nobashite.   
  
Fluffy: *a la XJo-Chan* -.-; Oh dear God . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ Te o nobashite! (Dances around the room, dragging a very unhappy Fluffy along for the ride.)   
  
Yue: (giggles hysterically) Hey! *light bulb* Let's dress Fluffy up! And Inuyasha too!   
  
Fluffy: -.-; Oh no . . . . . no no nonononononononoooooooo . . . .   
  
IY: (looks up from laughing) O.o; Eep . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: I dunno . . . . they've been so well-behaved this week. (The bishies nod enthusiastically, "Yes we've been good!")   
  
Yue: (puts dress on Kouga) Well, okay, we'll leave them be. (Bishies go "Phew!")   
  
Kouga: O.O AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!   
  
Yue: What about Chiriko?   
  
Mik-chan: (sits back down and turns off the music, much to Fluffy's relief) What about him? There's not much that fazes that kid.   
  
Yue: Can we decorate the hamster ball?   
  
Mik-chan: We could . . . trouble is, he just kinda sits there, spouting random nonsense . . . . "The stars foretell misfortune!" Little pink-haired freak of nature . . . .   
  
Yue: I'm sure if we dress him up like a girl it will bother him. Or we could make a Pokémon costume for him.   
  
Mik-chan: Pokémon . . . . (shudders) I dunno, Yue . . . .   
  
Yue: Hmmm....there has to be something.   
  
Mik-chan: I can't think of anything . . . anything I haven't already tried, that is.   
  
Yue: Drat. He really is a freak of nature.   
  
Mik-chan: -.-; I've been trying to tell you that all along . . . . I mean, he doesn't have any real weaknesses, you know? Not like with Ami-chan, where all you have to do is take away his flute . . . .   
  
Amiboushi: DON'T YOU TOUCH MY FLUTE!   
  
Mik-chan: Or just mention taking away his flute . . . .   
  
Yue: *evil grin* Oh really? (Steals flute.)   
  
Amiboushi: (chases Yue) MY FLUTE! MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE!   
  
Yue: Where did Miroku disappear to? (Runs from Amiboushi.)   
  
Mik-chan: To get more lace.   
  
Amiboushi: GIMME MY FLUTE!   
  
Yue: (tosses flute into cornfield) Go get it, you sap!   
  
Amiboushi: NOOOOOOOO! (Tears in after flute.)   
  
Yue: Heh heh heh . . . . (Watches as her evil psycho turkeys gang up on him.)   
  
Amiboushi: O.o; EEP! SEIRYUU, HAVE MERCY! EVIL TURKEYS OF DEATH! AAAAAAAH! (Runs screaming from the cornfield.)   
  
Yue: Hey! Miroku, where'd you run off to? Lace doesn't take that long to get!   
  
Mik-chan: (is in tears laughing as she watches the turkeys chase Ami-chan) BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!   
  
Yue: You wanna know what the best part is? (Holds up flute.) I never really threw it.   
  
Mik-chan: Ooooooooh . . . . how eeeeeeeeevil . . . . I love it! ^.^   
  
Yue: (grins nastily, causing every bishounen in a ten-mile radius to run like hell) I know. Muahahahahahaaa . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: O.o; *under her breath* No wonder Miroku's afraid of you . . . .   
  
Yue: -.- What was that?   
  
Mik-chan: Nothing . . . absolutely nothing. (Her ass is saved from certain annihilation by Amiboushi running through, pursued by many evil psycho gobbling turkeys.)   
  
Amiboushi: WAAAAAAH! WHY MEEEEEE?!   
  
Mik-chan: Because somebody needs to be the source of our sick brand of entertainment and you were convenient.   
  
Amiboushi: O.o; Wha . . . ?   
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ Author logic . . . ain't it wonderful?   
  
Amiboushi: -.- Just peachy . . . .   
  
Yue: (throws corn for the turkeys to eat) That's enough, my sweet pets.   
  
Turkeys: *gobble gobble . . . the corn, that is*   
  
Mik-chan: -.-; Yue, you're the only person I know who can live next to a cornfield, totally bend the skizi houshi to your will, put Kouga in a frilly pink dress, and command an army of evil turkeys . . . and make it look GOOD.   
  
Yue: Thanks . . . I think. (Holds up flute.) Looking for this, Ami-chan?   
  
Amiboushi: My FLUUUUUUUUUUUTE!   
  
Yue: Fetch. (Throws it on the roof . . . for real this time.)   
  
Amiboushi: NOOOOOOO! (Leaps after his flute . . . only to realize, in midair, that he can't fly.)   
  
Yue: Boy, he sure can run. (Looks and sees Miroku coming out of the house with an armful of lace.)   
  
Mik-chan: I trained him well. (Amiboushi crashes to the ground in a heap of tangled limbs.)   
  
Amiboushi: (curls into a fetal ball and sobs) I hate you . . . . (Looks longingly up at the roof where is flute is and bursts into tears.)   
  
Mik-chan: (closes eyes and chants) He's a source of entertainment, you don't care about his deep-rooted emotional trauma . . . he's a source of entertainment, you don't care about his deep-rooted emotional trauma . . . . aw hell. (Retrieves flute.) If I give ya the damn flute, will you turn off the waterworks?   
  
Amiboushi: *sniffle* Ye . . es . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: All right then . . . . (Hands him the flute.) Here. Now you better run before Yue decides to have some more fun with you.   
  
Amiboushi: *big sappy smiley face* MY FLUUUUUUUUUTE! (Huggles his beloved flute for a second, then tackles Mik-chan.) Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyoooooouuuuuuu!   
  
Mik-chan: O.o; *eye twitch* HENTAAAAAIIIIIIIII! (Boots Amiboushi to Kingdom Been and Gone, which, for those of you who don't know, is her hometown.)   
  
Yue: He wasn't glomping. Why'd you boot him?   
  
Mik-chan: (gets up, smoothing her ruffled feathers . . . so to speak) That's my natural reaction to being tackled by any overenthusiastic teenage male to whom I am not attached.   
  
Yue: -.-; Uh-huh . . . . (Hugs Miroku.) What took so long?   
  
Miroku: I was accosted by those demon children again.   
  
Yue: Oh, Haden and Herb, eh?   
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ Which would account for the large watermelon stapled to your head, ne?   
  
Yue: O.o; What did they do this time?   
  
Miroku: (points to the watermelon) This.   
  
Yue: (raises eyebrows) Word of advice, Miroku, sweetie. When dealing with them, your best bet is to run like hell.   
  
Miroku: -.-; I did.   
  
Yue: O.o; Oh . . . . Run faster.   
  
Mik-chan: O.o; Eep . . . .   
  
Yue: (turns to Kouga) Had enough, Wolf-boy?   
  
Kouga: (turns a shade of pink that totally clashes with his dress) Yes . . . ma'am . . . .   
  
Yue: And what do you have to say about yelling at me?   
  
Kouga: (grits his teeth) G-Gomen nasai.   
  
Yue: Okay. (Unties Kouga.) No attacking Miroku, either.   
  
Kouga: Yes, ma'am.   
  
Mik-chan: DUDE! You totally whipped him!   
  
Yue: I did, didn't I? (Lets Kouga go.) Whaddya know . . . . (There is a sudden and thunderous standing ovation for Yue-chan from the GB Crew.)   
  
GB Crew: YAY!   
  
Yue: (smiles) Me? Thank you! Thank you everyone! (The clapping continues.)   
  
Yue: (bows) Thank you, thank you . . . .   
  
GB Crew: YAY FOR YUE-CHAN!   
  
Yue: ^.^ Thank you, and thank Miroku for helping me! (And there was much rejoicing . . . yay. Kouga stands in the midst of it all, looking absolutely miserable.)   
  
Kouga: -.- You all SUCK . . . .   
  
Yue: (ignores him) ^.^ Yay! (Hugs the monk.)   
  
Miroku: ^.^   
  
Mik-chan: All right, beat it, all of you. Any more happy-fluffy-genki-ness around here and I'm liable to start doing some real Blair-Witch-viewer-with-a-weak-stomach-quality projectile vomiting. Do I make myself clear? (GB Crew goes O.o; and hightails it outta there PDQ.)   
  
Yue: Hm. Now I need something else to do . . . who wants to go shopping at the mall?   
  
Mik-chan: (jumps up and down) OO! ME! ME!   
  
Yue: Hehe . . . Mik-chan, is that a yes?   
  
Mik-chan: -.-* Whaddya think?   
  
Yue: Okay, okay! (Pulls out her junky excuse of a station wagon from the garage.) Get in, Miroku.   
  
Miroku: OK! (Hops in obediently.)   
  
Kouga: Um, Yue? Can I take off the dress now? Please?   
  
Yue: NO! Get in, Kouga.   
  
Kouga: -.-; PLEEEEEEEAAAAAAASE?   
  
Yue: No. We have to get going now. Keep it on and GET IN THE CAR!   
  
Kouga: -.-: I can't believe I'm doing this . . . . (Grovels at Yue-chan's feet.) Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?   
  
Yue: Miroku, please do something about Wolf-Boy.   
  
Miroku: Yes mistress . . . .   
  
Kouga: -.- You touch me, monk and I'll . . . . (Miroku hits him over the head with a shovel.)   
  
Yue: (glares at Kouga) You'll do what?   
  
Mik-chan: He'll sit there in the driveway, looking only slightly better than a raccoon that's had a close encounter of the eighteen-wheeled kind, that's what. (Kouga obligingly does just that.)   
  
Miroku: Good call.   
  
Mik-chan: Oi, if you want to save on gas money, I'll drive.   
  
Yue: Okay!   
  
Mik-chan: Very well then . . . . (Everyone is magically transferred to Mik-chan's place.) OK, everybody into the blue Nissan Altima. And be nice to Bluebell. She's had a rough week. (They all pile in. Yue drags Kouga along, expressly for the purpose of torturing him some more during the trip.)   
  
Miroku: Bluebell?   
  
Mik-chan: So I named my car, big fat hairy deal. If you've got a problem, you can walk. (Backs out of the driveway.) Hang on, minna.   
  
Yue: Oh boy . . . . (Hangs on.)   
  
Mik-chan: Here we go . . . . (Shifts from Reverse to Neutral, hits the brake for a split second, shifts to Drive . . . and floors it. Bluebell leaps forward like a boot-smacked alley cat.)   
  
Yue: (flies forward and then back into Miroku) Talk about whiplash. ^.^   
  
Miroku: (huggles Yue-chan) Indeed!   
  
Mik-chan: Hey, no funny business back there. The only one who's allowed to get any in the backseat of my car is me.   
  
Yue: Not a problem . . . . ^.^ So what mall are we going to, Mik-chan?   
  
Mik-chan: I was thinking King of Prussia.   
  
Yue: Huh?   
  
Mik-chan: Biggest mall complex on the east coast. You might wanna buckle up and hang on. It's gonna be a fast and bumpy ride. I drive like a roller coaster. ^.^   
  
Yue: (checks in purse to make sure she's got her credit cards and money) Don't worry, I like fast rides.   
  
Miroku: How about a fast ride from a documented psychopath?   
  
Yue: I'm sure I'll manage.   
  
Mik-chan: You'd better have everything, 'cause I ain't turning around.   
  
Yue: I have everything, don't worry.   
  
Mik-chan: Good. (Turns on the radio.)   
  
Yue: What station?   
  
Mik-chan: 72.4WINK.   
  
Yue: Never heard of it.   
  
Mik-chan: My CD player. ^.^   
  
Yue: Oh! Well, that makes more sense. (Leans against Miroku and watches scenery pass by.)   
  
Miroku: (struggles with his hentai urges, talking to himself melodramatically) Must . . . repress . . . hentai . . . urges . . .must . . . not . . . glomp . . . kawaii . . . Yue-chan . . . .   
  
Yue: -.- Don't even think about it, Miroku. Hugs I allow. Glomping...only I can do that! ^.^   
  
Miroku: Very well . . . . (Hugs for all he's worth.) Whatever works. ("Tactics"suddenly blasts from the speakers.)   
  
Yue: (jumps at the loud sound) Loud enough radio, Mik-chan?   
  
Mik-chan: (shrugs) I like it loud. Mostly cause I sing along.   
  
Yue: I noticed.   
  
Miroku: I'm fairly certain that we're violating some community ordinances here . . . .   
  
Mik-chan: When I give a flying rat's ass, I'll let you know.   
  
Yue: That's our Mik-chan. (Lets Miroku hug her and smiles.)   
  
Mik-chan: (starts singing along in a powerful alto) Gira tto shita kimi no me ni   
Doki tto shita hirusagari   
Shakki tto shita ore no karada marude tamesareteru you ni   
Tsun tto shita kimi to kuuki ni zoku tto shita koigokoro wa   
Zara tto shita suna wo kami sareru ga mama yoru ni naru.   
Sorosoro jiman no kuchibiru de wain wo nomasete kurenai ka   
Mangetsu no yoru ni musubareta otoko to onna wa eien sa . . . .   
  
Yue: (looks over at Kouga, who is beginning to wake up) Well, look who's up . . . .   
  
Kouga: Zzz . . . nyeh . . . mm . . . huh? Are we there yet?   
  
Yue: (joins in with Mik-chan, even though she doesn't know the words) Quiet, Kouga, we're singing.   
  
Mik-chan: Hageshiku Lady Ah Give me your love.   
Ayashiku Lady I need your love.   
Kimi no shigusa ni furimawasarete   
Muchuu no ai wa ore no naka de odoru .   
  
Yue: (leans over Miroku and pinches Kouga's cheek) That dress looks so cute on you! Yes, yes it does!   
  
Mik-chan: Almost there . . . three, two, one . . . hang on tight!   
  
Yue: Yikes . . . . (Holds on tight.)   
  
Mik-chan: YEE-HAA! (Turns the wheel hard to the left, sending the car into a full 360 spin.)   
  
Yue: OH GOD, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! (Buries her head in Miroku's shoulder. The car turns completely around and screeches to a halt . . . which leaves us parked perfectly between the lines of parking space.)   
  
Mik-chan: (takes off her sunglasses and checks the lines) Ha! Every time! ^.^   
  
Yue: (peeks out) Is it safe?   
  
Mik-chan: (grins like she does this every day . . . which she generally does) We're here!   
  
Yue: Thank God! (Opens door and falls onto the pavement.)   
  
Mik-chan: -.- Oi, I'm a good driver, thank you very much . . . . (looks around) Bloody hell.   
  
Yue: What is it?   
  
Mik-chan: ^.^; Eh heh heh . . . I may be a good driver, but I'm lousy with directions. (Points to a road sign that says, "Welcome to New Jersey.")   
  
All: O.O; GAAAAAAH! (They pile back into the car and burn rubber back to Mik-chan's place, where they will remain, recovering UNTIL NEXT TIME!)   
  
~owari~ 


	2. Episode Two: Bishie Harems and Giggling

Mik-chan: ohayou!  
  
Yue: Ohayou! *waves*  
  
Mik-chan : *waveity waveity*  
  
Yue: You want kouga back?  
  
Mik-chan : ummmm . . . not really . . .  
  
Yue : okay....  
  
Kouga: OI! YOU UNGRATEFUL . . . .  
  
*sound of newspaper colliding with skull*  
  
Mik-chan: quiet furrball  
  
Yue : --- is keepin Miroku ;)  
  
Mik-chan : be my guest  
  
Miroku: HEY! THAT IS NOT FAIR!  
  
Yue: I thought you liked me Miroku *wink wink*  
  
Mik-chan: Fairs are for tourists, houshi, get used to it  
  
Yue : It could be worse, Miroku...  
  
Miroku: *hastily covering his lapse in judgement* of course i do, yue-sama . . . i just don't like feeling . . . *GLARES at Mik-chan* . . . rejected.  
  
Mik-chan: unloved  
  
Yue: *Hugs Miroku* you're not rejected  
  
Mik-chan : maybe a little UNWANTED  
  
Miroku: Lucky me. *sigh*  
  
Yue: oh, stop being a baby. I love you  
  
Twinling: hello, this is the evil twinling related to yue chan. I'm a big fan of yours  
  
Mik-chan: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!  
  
Twinling: LOL  
  
Mik-chan: gomen ne . . . tis my usual reaction to fans. RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!  
  
Twinling: No, yue's gonna talk through me. Its only a bloody rabbit  
  
Mik-chan: *smack* no, bad mik-chan, get a grip. YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! EEEEEEEEEEEEEW EW EW EW EW! YUCKY DEAD BUNNY!  
  
Twinling : muhwahahaha! *resurrects the evil dead bunny*  
  
Mik-chan : O.O;;;;;;;;;; now i'm afraid  
  
Twinling: lol, so is yue  
  
Mik-chan: oi, can we send the evil undead bunny after Ami-chan?  
  
Twinling: cant be as frightening as Miroku asking you to bear his child. sure!  
  
Mik-chan : yes, well . . . about that . . . . ^.^; eh heh heh . . . .  
  
Twinling : lol. wow, im glad no monk comes around asking me that  
  
Mik-chan : give it time . . . . . three......two....one...  
  
*miroku falls through the front door  
  
Miroku: Good afternoon!  
  
Mik-chan: *sigh* oi . . . . .  
  
Twinling: agh!  
  
Miroku: O.o; Twins?! We've got twins here?! *hentai grin* Hell yeah . . . .  
  
Mik-chan: *bops Miroku with that ever-present rolled up newspaper* Down boy.  
  
Miroku: @.@ I hate it when you do that . . .  
  
Twinling: lol, well its a good thing someone does it *looks at the monk* you're what my twin was barking about?  
  
Miroku: Barking? Well, I wouldn't call it that . . . but yes, in a way I suppose  
  
Twinling: hehe. well, lets just say yue-chan fell head over heels for you, even if she did reject your question  
  
Miroku: *raises an eyebrow at Yue-chan* Did she now?  
  
Twinling: maaaaaayyyyyybbbeeee  
  
Miroku: *knowing grin* I see . . . *self-satisfied smirk* She wants me . .  
  
*more swatting with the newspaper*  
  
Mik-chan: HENTAI!  
  
Miroku: Owwwww . . . see how mean she is to me?  
  
Twinling: *pulls out meat tenderizer* there will be no hentai with my twin! *waves it around threateningly* besides, what makes you think i won't torture her before she ever gets back to you?  
  
Miroku: O.o;;;;;;;;;;;;;; eep  
  
Mik-chan: A meat tenderizer? That's a new one . . .  
  
Twinling: lol, its my culinary weapon  
  
Mik-chan: I usually use a dull, rusty vegetable peeler. ^.^  
  
Twinling: ahh, but rusty spikes are so much more fun, very stress relieving *sympathetic look to miroku* awwwww, I could never hurt the cute wittle monk  
  
Miroku: Of course not . . . . you'd just maim me for life  
  
Twinling: no! of course not! I don't hurt cute people **a strange noise can be heard from inside the closet, sounds a lot like a muffled yue-chan**  
  
Mik-chan: So beating on Miroku shouldn't be a problem, ne? ^.^ yue-chan is in . . . the closet  
  
Twinling: LOL  
  
Mik-chan : -.- does somebody wanna explain to this poor deluded little rurouni exactly WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!  
  
Twinling: no, no, yue chan isnt in the closet. **turkey call from inside closet**  
  
Mik-chan: turkeys . . . -.- righty-o then . . . .  
  
KumariShadow : ((remember this is yue chan as well...the turkeys are hers!))  
  
Mik-chan : turkeys in the closet . . . somehow, that's even more disturbing  
  
Twinling: *pounces on the monk*  
  
Miroku: GAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *gasping* Don't DO that! you're gonna give me a heart attack!  
  
Twinling: *innocent* (pheh, yeah right) whyyy?  
  
Mik-chan: *glomps herself a Chichiri* That's the whole idea.  
  
Chichiri: @.@ DAAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Twinling: Mik-chan has the right idea! *squeezes the monk*  
  
**Yue-chan pounding on door** 'My monk! my monk!  
  
Mik-chan: which one? -.- *glares suspiciously*  
  
Twinling: Miroku  
  
Mik-chan : good  
  
Twinling: why, are there more  
  
Mik-chan: cause, see . . . CHICHIRI IS MINE! MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE!  
  
Twinling: dun worry, you can have him  
  
Mik-chan: hmph . . . mine . . . .  
  
Twinling: i want hoto-sama myself, personally, lol  
  
Mik-chan: MINE, I SAY! HH you can have he's on the Bus  
  
**yue breaks out of closet and drag's miroku away*   
  
Yue: how dare you hug the enemy!!!!  
  
Miroku: @.@ eep . . . . .  
  
Twinling: yayayay! i get HH!!!!  
  
Mik-chan: yes. you'll just have to Indian-wrestle Zan-chan for him . . . . ^.^ did i forget to mention that?  
  
Twinling: erm...yes...  
  
Mik-chan: silly me! ^.^  
  
Twinling: well, is anyone else up for grabs?  
  
Mik-chan: hmmmm . . . .. Soujirou, Aoshi. . . . . lessee . . .Kenshin is MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE! MINE BY RIGHT OF CONQUEST!  
  
Yue-chan: kisses miroku on the cheek...then hits him over the head*  
  
Mik-chan: and Sano too . . . hehe ^.^ mik-chan's a bigamist  
  
Twinling : lol... i see that  
  
Mik-chan: but i usually don't look at it that way  
  
Twinling: lol, personally i like to think of it as a harem  
  
Mik-chan: i see it as . . . giving myself options. YES! HAREMS RULE! OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOOOO!  
  
Twinling: *big smiles* and having crazy scientists who want to destroy the universe to help you aint a bad thing either  
  
Mik-chan: -.-; that's a new one  
  
Twinling: lol, washu helps my friend nikki-chan and I collect our bishie's  
  
Mik-chan: kewl  
  
Twinling: can we let chiriko out of the hamster ball so i can play with him? or can we just play with him in the hamster ball?  
  
Mik-chan: play with the hamster ball  
  
Twinling: kay  
  
Mik-chan: it's fun to kick it around the room and watch Pink Boy go flying ^.^ collecting bishies, huh?  
  
Twinling: ^.^ yup. yue-chan: is there a hamster ball we could fit kouga in?  
  
Mik-chan: hmmm . . . . i don't think there's enough room for both him and his . . . . . ego  
  
Twinling: i could have one made special...hehehehe. never trust someone with an ego bigger then their own head  
  
Mik-chan: hmm. . . indeed  
  
Yue: we took the ego down a few notches yesterday with the pink dress*  
  
Mik-chan: actually, i think i'd rather keep him outside the hamster ball. makes it easier to torment him with frilly pink clothes and nail polish, and make up and stuff ^.^  
  
KumariShadow : hehe, true, he might hurt his ego...might step on it in such tight quarters ^.^  
  
Mik-chan: could be, if it didn't flatten him first  
  
Twinling: true  
  
Yue-chan: Is IY there?  
  
Kouga: *still in his lovely pink dress* Who cares?  
  
IY: *hides behind the couch* No he's not!  
  
Twinling: *smacks Kouga* Silence, Wolf-Boy.  
  
*Mik-chan drags him out by an ear* come now, inu-chan be sociable  
  
Kouga: -.- *grumble grumble grumble*  
  
Twinling: Heyla IY! Come say hello to my twin, I'm sure she'd like to meet you....  
  
Mik-chan: don't mind Kouga. he's PMSing  
  
Kouga: I AM NOT!  
  
IY: *bursts out laughing at Kouga as seems to be his habit*  
  
Twinling: IY, want to join him in the dress?  
  
IY: *stops laughing and hiccups* N-No thank you!  
  
Twinling: hehe...I thought so  
  
Mik-chan: Aw, leave him alone. Kouga made a total ass of the poor thing a few weeks ago. He deserves all the paybacks he can get.  
  
*Chichiri discreetly sneaks toward the door*  
  
Twinling: I see *sympathetic glance at IY* I apologize  
  
*Mik-chan catches the tail of his kesa and yoinks him back into the room*  
  
Mik-chan: not so fast  
  
IY: Fine . . . . whatever . . . .  
  
Twinling: lol! Hey, your monk seems like he's more eager to get away than mine is........  
  
Iy: can I laugh at kouga now?  
  
Twinling: yes, you may  
  
Chichiri: *aside* You have NO idea, no da . . . .  
  
IY: Thank you . . . . *ahem* BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!  
  
kouga: -.-*   
  
(are we entertaining or WHAT?! ^.^)  
  
Yue-chan: Back! *hugs Miroku* Twinling will be back soon. Perhaps I can give Kouga to her.   
  
Kouga: OI!  
  
Mik-chan: *rubs her ear* Now what?  
  
Kouga: I DO NOT APPRECIATE BEING FOISTED OFF ON OTHER PEOPLE AT THE SLIGHTEST WHIM! SHOW A LITTLE LOYALTY, DAMNIT!  
  
Mik-chan: OK *hugs Chichiri* there! loyalty! ^.^  
  
Yue: *hits kouga* you're the one who deserves it  
  
Kouga: -.- not what i meant . . .  
  
Yue: yelling at me like that the other day Kouga... why shouldn't I? Better than feeding you to the turkeys. besides, Miroku is enough of a challenge to handle without having you around  
  
Kouga: -.-* grrrrrrr  
  
Yue: *sticks her tongue out at Kouga  
  
Mik-chan: Feed him to the turkeys . . . . hahahahahahaa  
  
*turkeys peck at him then refuse to eat him in disgust*  
  
*Kouga sets a world record for number of popping veins*  
  
*yue-chan and miroku laugh*  
  
Mik-chan: *points and laughs at Kouga*  
  
*turkeys point and laugh at kouga*  
  
All: BWAHAHAHHAHAHAAAA!  
  
Mik-chan: GIGGLING POULTRY! BWAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAAAAAA!  
  
Yue: *laughs even harder and falls, dragging Miroku down with her*  
  
Miroku: O.O Hello! yikes . . . . pleasedon'tkillmepleasedon'tkillme  
  
Yue: *looks at miroku with hurt expression* why would I do that? *pout*  
  
Miroku: Umm . . . no reason, really . . . .  
  
Yue:*big teary eyes* You really think that I would do that? *tears start to form*  
  
Miroku: I guess the fact that we seem to have landed in a . . . er, compromising position doesn't mean you'll flay me alive?  
  
Yue:.......*tears start to fall* I wouldn't flay you alive..... (is the master of crying)  
  
Miroku: *BIG HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF* thank god . . . er, buddha. awww, don't cry, yue-chan, it makes me sad  
  
IY: *cough cough* SAP! *cough cough hack*  
  
Yue: *stops crying and kisses Miroku* Okay!  
  
Miroku: O.O YAHOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Yue: *hugs her monk  
  
miroku: I've died and gone to heaven . . . .  
  
Yue: *smiles at Miroku* I bet 


	3. Episode Three: Trouble Arises Part One

Mik-chan: OHAYOU!  
  
Yue: Ohayou!!!! was waiting for you!  
  
Mik-chan: Do tell  
  
Yue: Hehe, not too sure if you want to know  
  
Mik-chan: Tell me. after the week i just had, i can handle anything  
  
Yue : You sure? you might have a heart attack  
  
Mik-chan: I'm only 18. i'll be fine. no prior history of heart disease here  
  
Yue: Okay....Miroku and I got engaged  
  
Mik-chan *clutches chest and falls to the floor* eep . . . .  
  
Yue: LOL! I told you!  
  
Mik-chan: *climbs rather painfully back into her chair* WHEN THE HELL DID THIS HAPPEN?! wait a minute . . . . . better yet, WHY did this happen?  
  
Yue: what???  
  
Mik-chan: *suspicious glare* Miroku . . . . .  
  
Yue: I happen to be in love with Miroku!  
  
Miroku: *waves hands frantically* I didn't do anything!  
  
Mik-chan: just makin' sure . . . .  
  
Yue: *shields the monk* he's telling the truth  
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ yayfor you guys!  
  
Yue: I told you it was a shocker  
  
Mik-chan: *catches her breath*  
  
Yue: But I had fun at home, playing with Miroku's mind  
  
Miroku: Yes well . . . .  
  
Mik-chan: Just as long as that's ALL you were playing with  
  
Yue: Yes, it was  
  
Miroku: *hentai grin* as far as she knows . . . .  
  
Yue: Mik-chan is sick minded *slaps miroku*  
  
Mik-chan: *SWAT* bad monk! BAD BAD BAD BAD!  
  
Yue: *hits miroku into the floor*  
  
Miroku: @.@ What did I say?  
  
Yue: No hentai!  
  
Mik-chan: Skizi houshi . . . as if you didn't know! Hentai no baka . . . .  
  
Yue: so, you want to be in the wedding?  
  
Mik-chan: YES!!!  
  
Yue: yay! *does her happy dance* I need a best man too...  
  
Mik-chan: *grabs IY by the ear* He volunteers!  
  
IY: THE BLOODY HELL I DO!  
  
Yue: no! not IY. too much trouble and bad language. Besides, he might kill the groom.  
  
Mik-chan: I doubt it  
  
Yue: I don't. try someone else  
  
Mik-chan: that rosary IS good for something, you know  
  
Yue: Chichiri! He can be the best man!  
  
IY: Don't you dare . . . . O.O  
  
Mik-chan: OSUWARI!  
  
*Iy crashes to the floor*  
  
IY: I HATE YOU . . . .  
  
Yue: We hate you too IY  
  
Chichiri: Oi, don't bring me into this, nan no da. i want no part of your insanity  
  
Yue: why? you'd be a good best man  
  
Chichiri: besides, miroku gives monks a bad name, no da  
  
Yue: *big teary eyes*  
  
Chichiri: stop that!  
  
Yue: *gets ready to cry* WWWWWWAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH  
  
Mik-chan: *snuggles her monk and gives the big sad soulful eyes as only she can*oh PLEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAASE?  
  
Chichiri: GAH! Knock it off, no da!  
  
Yue: *siren-like cries continue* WWWWAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH  
  
Mik-chan: PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE?!  
  
Chichiri: ALL RIGHT!  
  
Yue: *breaks a window with her cries*  
  
Chichiri: for crying out loud . . . .  
  
Yue: *stops crying* Thank you! *hugs chichiri*  
  
Chichiri -.-; i have a bad feeling about this, no da  
  
Yue: now we need bride's maids  
  
Mik-chan: *jumps up and down* Oo! Oo! Pick me! Pick me!  
  
Yue: *points at Mik-chan* I choose you!  
  
Mik-chan goes "YAY!" and poings around the room like a neko on speed.  
  
Yue: *laughs* What else do we need???  
  
Mik-chan: ah  
  
Yue: dresses and suits  
  
Mik-chan: that too  
  
Yue: flower girls *drags out kouga and IY* you two get that job  
  
Both: WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!  
  
Yue: *gets out her crystal sword and waves it threateningly* you will be the flower girls or else  
  
Kouga: O.O eep . . .  
  
Yue: IY????  
  
IY: *says nothing, just hides* pleasedon'tkillmepleasedontkillme  
  
Yue: Then say yes or I say the magic word  
  
IY: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Yue: SIT!  
  
*tosses Shippou into the frame* USE HIM! *thud*  
  
Yue: *looks at Shippou* you're the ring bearer  
  
Shippou SPLATS against the computer screen and slowly slides off, leaving a little spit smear on the glass  
  
Shippou: Ite . . . .  
  
Yue: *picks him up and brushes him off* oh wait! sudden thought  
  
Yue: Hoto-sama can be best man, we need Chichiri to perform the ceremony  
  
Chichiri: -.- You CAN'T be serious, no da  
  
Yue: I AM serious *points sword at the monk*  
  
Chichiri: O.O; Eep . . . . *hides behind Mikomi*  
  
Mik-chan: -.- Oh, NOW you wanna get close . . . .  
  
Yue: Please Mik-chan! Can't he do it?  
  
Mik-chan: Hang on, we'll go into the other room and . . . *wicked hentai grin* . . . discuss it.  
  
Chichiri: *as he's being dragged out* NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Yue: have fun  
  
*Chichiri hangs onto the door frame for dear life; Mik-chan yanks on his leg*  
  
Yue: *smacks Chichiri so he lets go of door*  
  
Mik-chan: Come ON! Don't be . . . such a . . . baby!  
  
*Chichiri goes flying back into the room and the door slams shut*  
  
Yue: *goes to torture Kouga and IY with new dress designs*  
  
*unidentifiable scuffling noises are heard from behind the closed door. thud thud THUD!*  
  
Chichiri: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Yue: *laughs uncontrollably*  
  
Mik-chan: geez, you're so childish . . . you act like you've never been tied down to a girl's bed before!  
  
All: O.O;  
  
Yue: *falls down and looks at Miroku* You should be lucky that you're marrying an almost sane   
woman  
  
Miroku: ALMOST?!  
  
Yue: just kiddin!  
  
Mik-chan: dearest, forgive me, but you're far from ALMOST sane  
  
Yue: I'm sane  
  
*more unidentifiable scuffling*  
  
Yue: what does that mean? *glares*  
  
*random swearing and "no da"*  
  
Miroku: it means . . . you are crazy . . . but i don't mind. I'm kinda used to it.  
  
Yue: I AM NOT CRAZY!  
  
Miroku: *hugs hugs hugs* it's ok to be crazy  
  
Mik-chan: *pops her head out the door* What he said. *slams the door shut again*  
  
Yue: *places hand on sword hilt* You want to disagree Miroku?  
  
Miroku: Not really  
  
Yue: good  
  
Miroku: you're perfectly sane, darling  
  
Yue: thank you. Now help me pick out material for my dress *opens closet with bunch of material in it  
  
Miroku: Oh boy. . . wait, isn't the groom not allowed to see his bride in her dress before the ceremony?  
  
Shippou: hey, that's right! *boots Miroku out of the room* get lost!  
  
Yue: fine! *sighs* Shippou you help me then.  
  
Shippou: ^.^ ok!  
  
*the door crashes open*  
  
Yue: I don't know what color to choose, I just don't want it to be white  
  
Shippou: Oh, they're back. that was quick  
  
Yue: *gets sword ready*  
  
Shippou: not the guys, the lovebirds  
  
Yue: oh *puts sword away*  
  
Mik-chan: *tries unsuccessfully to smooth her rumpled hair back into place* He'll do it.  
  
Yue: *smiles* good  
  
Chichiri: *staggers out with his clothing askew and lipstick marks everywhere* (and i mean EVERYWHERE)  
  
Chichiri: @.@ Daaaaaaa . . . .  
  
Yue: *raises eyebrows questioningly*  
  
Mik-chan: What?  
  
Yue: Mik-chan......  
  
Mik-chan: *big innocent eyes* Yes?  
  
Yue: you scare me at times  
  
Mik-chan: Do I? Do I REALLY?  
  
Yue: oh yes. *shakes head* No wonder Miroku is afraid of you  
  
Mik-chan: * BIG SCARY BLOODSHOT EYES *  
  
Miroku: Well, that's because I know what . . . *Mik-chan claps a hand over his mouth* mmmphgrhphmmrgh  
  
Yue: Knows what? *looks at Mik-chan*  
  
Mik-chan: Nothing! He know NUTZ-ING!  
  
Yue: Oh really? And just what would that "nothing" be?  
  
Miroku: mmmtkiiikkkzbmmhhru  
  
Yue: *gets her sword out* Mik-chan??? Let my fiance go.  
  
Mik-chan: *duct tapes Miroku's mouth shut* ok.  
  
Yue: *laughs* fine, I won't ask. *duct tapes Chichiri's mouth shut* There, we're even  
  
Chichiri: dmmmmmmmm (which of course, is "DAAAAAAAAAAA!" with your mouth taped shut)  
  
Yue: hehe. Now, back to the dresses....  
  
Miroku: *rips the tape off* I was gonna say I know what Chichiri's been through  
  
Yue: Miroku, keep your mouth shut. O.O  
  
Mik-chan: -.-; oh boy, now I'm in for it. ^.^; Eh heh heh heh . . . .  
  
Mik-chan? *really big eyes*  
  
Mik-chan: it was a fling! just a one-night . . . er . . . week . . . stand . . . eh heh heh heh . . . oh dear  
  
Yue: *eye twitches*  
  
Mik-chan: RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY! *runs away*  
  
Yue: *sends turkeys after Mik-chan AND Miroku* I need to blast something....  
  
Miroku: WHAT?! WHY ME?! IT WAS HER FAULT! I WAS A VICTIM!  
  
Mik-chan: *from over the river and thru the woods* THE BLOODY HELL YOU WERE!  
  
Yue: Oh yeah! sorry. *withdraws turkeys from Miroku* Mik-chan, you have no room to talk!  
  
Mik-chan: AS I RECALL, YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WANTED TO BE ON TOP, HOUSHI NO BAKA!  
  
Yue: @.@  
  
Mik-chan: *waits for the nuclear explosion*  
  
Miroku: Mikomi . . you bitch . . . .  
  
Yue: *creates a fire bomb and launches it randomly* WHHHHHAAAAAAATTTTTT!!!!!!!!!  
  
Miroku: O.O *barely has time to "eep" before being burnt to a houshi-shaped marshmallow*  
  
Yue: *pulls out sword and eyes start glowing* SOMEONE IS GOING TO EXPLAIN THIS......NOW!  
  
IY: They both got drunk off their asses and make mad monkey love. Good enough?  
  
Mik-chan: Inuyasha . . . I'm going to hurt you  
  
Yue: *crushes IY* SHUT UP MORTAL!  
  
IY: Ite . . . BUT IT"S TRUE! ask your monk!  
  
Yue: *stomps IY* MIROKU??? *eyes twitching*  
  
Miroku: Um, um um . . . *searches desperately for an explanation* I was drunk . . . . ?  
  
Yue: *smacks the monk* not good enough  
  
Mik-chan: YOU WERE DRUNK FOR A F**KIN' WEEK? MAYBE THE FIRST NIGHT, BUT NOT THE OTHER SIX!  
  
Yue: SILENCE HUMAN! *points sword at Mik-chan*  
  
Mik-chan: well, it's true  
  
Yue: *calms down a bit* Well, even so, you could have done something about it, could you not have, Mik-chan?  
  
Mik-chan: Did i mention we were both drunk? at least i THOUGHT he was . . . he seemed awfully sober afterwards . .. .  
  
Yue: *gets her beaten up station wagon and starts the engine* I am going to drive around for a few minutes, and when I get back you two had better have a GOOD explanation. cause if you don't.....  
  
Mik-chan: what constitutes a good explanation?  
  
Yue: *steam pours out of her ears* Never mind! Just...never mind *sits in the car and fumes*  
  
Miroku: Oh dear . . . we're in trouble  
  
Mik-chan: You and your big fat mouth, bouzu! *thwaps Miroku with a mallet*  
  
Yue: *blasts the horn really loud*  
  
*everyone jumps*  
  
Yue: MIROKU!  
  
Miroku: I don't know what more she wants! We told her the truth . . . .  
  
Chichiri: *sits back looking VERY jealous* SO, Mik-chan, you have a thing for monks, no da?  
  
Yue: GET IN THE CAR! We are going shopping, and we are not going to speak of this any more. understand?  
  
Mik-chan: Chich-kun, i was drunk i told you that  
  
Miroku: Yes dear . . . *gets in the car*  
  
Yue: *glares at Mik-chan*  
  
Mik-chan: (oh dear, i'm in trouble)*glares back* What?  
  
Yue: *mutters rather loudly* Husband-stealer  
  
Mik-chan: at least you know he's not a complete novice, right?  
  
Yue: *throws sword at Mik-chan*  
  
Mik-chan: HEY! it was a FLING, ya hear me! a FLING! *dodges sword* OVER AND DONE WITH! he's yours now  
  
Yue: Sssuuureee it is....  
  
Mik-chan: *glares at Miroku* you're welcome to him, believe me  
  
Yue: *glances at Chichiri* I thought Chichiri belonged to someone else too  
  
Mik-chan: cause now i'm in trouble with Chich-kun and if we break up, there's gonna be HELL to pay  
  
Chichiri: Like who, no da?  
  
Yue: *laughs softly, then starts roaring*  
  
Mik-chan: -.-;  
  
Chichiri: -.-;  
  
Yue: *doubles over from laughter*  
  
Aoi: *suddenly coming onto the scene* Would you kindly explain to me what is so goddamned funny before I decide to become violent?  
  
Yue: *wipes tears from eyes and waves hand silently*  
  
Aoi: WELLLLLLL?  
  
Yue: Just thinking of how stupid this fight is  
  
Aoi: *thinks* geez, you're right. BWHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAAAAAA!  
  
Yue: besides, its not like I shouldn't have expected it. this is Miroku we're talking about  
  
Miroku: Hey . . . .  
  
Yue: *smiles at Miroku* But its true.... hey mik-chan, whatever happened to going to the King of Prussia Mall?  
  
Mik-chan: I got a little . . . side-tracked . . . . *gooses Chichiri*  
  
Chichiri: O.O; OROOOOOOOOO!  
  
*everyone turns and STARES*  
  
Tasuki: *who randomly arrived on the scene a minute ago* "oro?" What the f**k is oro? Aren't you s'posed ta say "da?"  
  
Yue: *hits Tasuki* shut up  
  
Tasuki: OI! Ya don't even know me and already ya wanna beat me up?! WHAT THE F**K IS GOIN' ON?!  
  
Yue: *growls* what did you say?  
  
Mik-chan: We're discussing my sex life, baka. Care to join the conversation?  
  
Yue: O.O  
  
Tasuki: O.o; No, that's ok, i think I'll just run screamin' back to Saja's now . . bye. *runs away screaming*  
  
Chichiri: Mik-chan . . . you didn't . . . . did you?  
  
Mik-chan: NO!  
  
Yue: *is lost*  
  
Miroku: So it's monks AND bandits. I see how it is.  
  
Yue: *hits Miroku* no one asked you  
  
Mik-chan: Great, they think I slept with Tasuki now . . . . just f**kin' beautiful . . . .  
  
Yue: I believe you Mik-chan. Chichiri, you should too  
  
IY: Well, didn't you?  
  
Mik-chan: Aoi-chan . . . if you would please . . . .  
  
Aoi: My pleasure . . . *pistol-whips IY* BAD DOG! BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD!  
  
Yue: No one in their right mind would sleep with him....or Inuyasha for that matter.  
  
Tasuki: *from far away* OI! I HEARD THAT!  
  
Mik-chan: WE KNOW! And he's not that bad, he's just . . . . loud . . . .  
  
Yue: *tosses fireball in Tasuki's direction* *decides to have some fun and gets out her really big truck...(with wheels that   
are bigger than she is) and turns on the engine* Hey Tasuki, wanna play chicken?  
  
*Tasuki hides under Saja' s bed where he usually hides*  
  
Mik-chan: aw, leave him alone. Poor guy, he lives with Sa-chan, after all. She's as bad as i am  
  
Yue: *turns engine off* oh...alright  
  
Chichiri: Although she's not HALF as driven as you are, koi-chan, no da  
  
Mik-chan: *peace sign* It's true!  
  
Yue: *laughs* We should still go to the mall. I'll drive this time  
  
Mik-chan: You don't like my driving? *pouts*  
  
Yue: I do, but I wanna drive my truck  
  
Mik-chan: oh dear god . . .  
  
Yue: what?  
  
Mik-chan: you . . . driving . . . big truck . . . . or dear  
  
Yue: My truck is as good as anything you have. *glares*  
  
Mik-chan: i know. tis just a scary thought  
  
Yue: oh *laughs*  
  
Mik-chan: large truck with all of us in it. cause for fright  
  
Yue: hehe, well, I have a few more people to pick up...  
  
Mik-chan: *raises an eyebrow* such as?  
  
Yue: a bishie that you haven't got  
  
Mik-chan: oh really? who might that be?  
  
Yue: Yugi Motou  
  
Mik-chan: you're right. no clue who that is  
  
Yue: he's from Yu-Gi-Oh  
  
Mik-chan: oh . . . him  
  
Yue: what's wrong with Yugi?  
  
Mik-chan: nothing  
  
Yue: ok  
  
Mik-chan: just saying, oh . . . him  
  
Yue: I see  
  
*recognition-like*  
  
Yue: so are we going?  
  
Mik-chan: King of Prussia  
  
Yue: LOL! *tosses down rope ladder so everyone can climb into the truck*  
  
*we all climb aboard*  
  
Chichiri passes out the Dramamine. Just in case . . . Shippou gets carsick very easily  
  
Yue: *starts the engine and steps on the gas pedal. truck lurches forward* Here we go! *slams on the gas pedal and goes at speed of 80 mph*  
  
*we all get slammed into the seat*  
  
Mik-chan: YIPE!  
  
Yue: *laughs and does around a sharp turn*  
  
Shippou: *looks rather green* i don't feel so good . . . .  
  
Yue: *opens window* if you're sick, do it out the window *goes around another sharp turn*  
  
Shippou: I'm gonna puuuuuuke . . . . *grabs Chichiri's kasa*  
  
Yue: *shouts* out the window kid!  
  
Chichiri: NO! *hangs Shippou out the window by his ankles*  
  
Yue: *slams on the brakes*  
  
Shippou: BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *THUD*  
  
*sound of many heads hitting the back of your seat*  
  
Yue: *turns around* you didn't get anything on my car did you?  
  
Shippou: nope  
  
Yue: good  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan! Is that you up there?  
  
Yue: *tosses down rope ladder* climb up here, Yugi! Just watch out for Shippou, the little rat's carsick.  
  
Mik-chan: he's a fox, baka-chan  
  
Yue: I know, I was just saying that  
  
Mik-chan: rat, fox, what's the diff, right?  
  
Yue: *helps Yugi into the car*   
  
Yugi: Hello everyone.  
  
Aoi: *raises an eyebrow and gives him a very interested once-over* Hello yourself.  
  
Everyone else: Hi . . . .  
  
Mik-chan: *who has fallen asleep in Chichiri's lap* Mm . . . nyeh . . . huh?  
  
Yugi: so where are we going, exactly?  
  
Mik-chan: Nani koto? Are we there yet?  
  
Yugi: *stares at Mik-chan* Yue-chan, who is this?  
  
Mik-chan: You mean . . . there's actually someone who DOESN'T know yet? *evil grin of death* Ohhh, I'm gonna have some fun with this one . . . .  
  
Chichiri: *to Yugi* You don't wanna know, no da.  
  
Yugi: Oh, okay. *turns back to Yue-chan* so where are we going?  
  
Aoi: *laughs hysterically* That's the spirit, boyo. *winks at Yugi*  
  
Mik-chan: *punches Chichiri in the stomach* don't be rude, koishii  
  
Chichiri: *doubles over, unable to breathe*   
  
Yugi: *stares at Mik-chan*  
  
Mik-chan: *stares back nonchalantly* What?  
  
Yugi: Must you be so violent?  
  
Mik-chan: *thwaps Yugi's nose with a knuckle* Yes . . . .  
  
Yugi: Ouch! *glares at Mik-chan* Baka.  
  
Yue: starts car back up and takes off*  
  
Mik-chan: *smiles pleasantly* Aren't I a pain in the nose? ^.^  
  
Yugi: *growls* -.-  
  
Mik-chan: ^.^ Aw, looka da fierce widdle puppy, isn't he cute?  
  
Yue-chan: Need I separate you two? Yugi, come sit up here next to me  
  
Chichiri: NO! DON'T DO THAT! SHE'LL TORTURE ME NEXT, NO DA!  
  
IY: You're her boyfriend, why the hell would she torture you?  
  
Yue: *glances back at Chichiri* poor monk... as long as Yugi is safe  
  
Chichiri: Because she's EVIL! and so is Yue!  
  
Yugi: *sticks his tongue out*  
  
Yue: *hits Chichiri*  
  
Mik-chan: O.O* WHY YOU LITTLE . . . . . *tackles Yugi*  
  
Yue: *slams brakes again*  
  
Mik-chan: ONLY I MAY MAKE CHICHIRI'S LIFE UNBEARABLE!  
  
Yue: HEY! You can tackle Miroku all you want, but NOBODY TOUCHES YUGI!  
  
Mik-chan: *smack swat trample kick bite gouge maul bash*  
  
Yugi: *grabs horn and blasts it, stunning everyone*  
  
Mik-chan: ow . . . .  
  
Yugi: laughs  
  
Mik-chan: *eyes glow bright green* Teme . . . . .  
  
Yue-chan: *steps in front of Yugi* take it out on Miroku  
  
*A large black cloak appears around Mik-chan's shoulders and her eyes turn bright peridot green, signaling her transformation into Nizûno Mikomi, one of the few people Kenshin's ever been truly afraid of.*  
  
Yue: *opens door and points to Nizûno Mikomi* Take it outside.  
  
NM: *glare* Don't tell me what to do, bitch  
  
Aoi: Come on Mom, play nice.  
  
Yue: *turns into a giant wolf and bares her teeth* *truck turns into a giant arena*  
  
NM: *raises an eyebrow* Is this supposed to bother me in some way?  
  
Aoi: Did I mention we're related?  
  
Yue: *shoots ice at NM and turns her into an ice cube*  
  
NM: *closes eyes calmly and focuses . . . * BLAM! *the ice cube shatters* If that's the best you can do, I'm just going to have to kill you now.  
  
Aoi: -.-; Did I mention she could rival Aoshi for stoicism?  
  
Yue: *fur turns into spikes* lets see you try!  
  
NM: As you wish . . . whatever you are . . . . *leaps into the air with Fluffy-like grace*  
  
Yue: *watches her*  
  
NM: HITEN MISTURUGI RYU, RYU SOU SEN!  
  
Yue: *fazes out and reappears behind NM* missed!  
  
NM: *bashes wolf thing and manages to crack a few spikes before pirouetting away and landing on the ground*  
  
Yue: *growls and begins to glow a bright red color*  
  
Yugi: uh-oh....  
  
NM: *raises an eyebrow* Now what? *to Yugi* Stop gibbering, child, she's not that frightening.  
  
Yugi: now you've really pissed her off. I suggest getting out of the truck...now  
  
NM: Leave? And forfeit? Ha!  
  
Yugi: fine, you can get blown up. I prefer to live. *grabs Shippou and jumps out of the truck*  
  
NM: Blown up? You MUST be joking . .. foolish boy.  
  
Aoi: Mom, why can't you just play nice with the other kids?  
  
NM: Because, Aoi-chan, I'm evil.  
  
Aoi: Oh yeah . . .  
  
Yue-chan: you should listen to the boy... *begins to get brighter and starts giving off a lot of heat*  
  
NM: *calmly stands her ground* You don't frighten me in the least. Aoi, please leave.  
  
Aoi: Why?  
  
NM: Because the only ass I'm allowed to endanger here is my own.  
  
Aoi: OK *leaves, dragging Chichiri with her*  
  
Chichiri: DAAAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Yue: *starts giving off heat like an erupting volcano* I am the Goddess of Fire! I fear no mortal!  
  
NM: That's something we have in common. *slides into a Gatotsu fighting stance*  
  
Yue: *starts blasting streams of fire everywhere*  
  
NM: bring it on  
  
Yue: *body turns to lava and flame* So be it! *charges at NM*  
  
*Mikomi leaps into the air over the lava and fire, twisting out of it's immediate path, landing several yards to the side.* too slow .   
  
Yue: *roars and glows even brighter* YOU SHALL BE DESTROYED!  
  
Chichiri: *fighting with Aoi* No! Leggo! Let me help her, no da!  
  
NM: *dodges again* Fat chance.  
  
Aoi: I thought you didn't like my mom!  
  
Chichiri: Are you kidding?  
  
*in the field, Mikomi dodges a big-ass fireball*  
  
Yue: *turns and looks at the truck engine, which is like a mini oil field* This ends now!  
  
Chichiri: Just because we fight occasionally doesn't mean I want her dead, no da! *shakes Aoi off and takes off at a run*  
  
Yue: *blasts the engine and blows up the truck with them in it*  
  
BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM *gigantic explosions rock the field as truck explodes*  
  
and when the dust settles . . . . . .  
  
Aoi: *looking out over the desolation* MIKOMI! CHICH-SAN! YUE?  
  
Yugi: YUE-CHAN!  
  
Aoi: This does not look good . . .  
  
*twitch twitch*  
  
Aoi: Wait! Something moved!  
  
*a glowing blue bubble appears in the gradually clearing smoke*  
  
Yugi: *runs through the rubble* YUE-CHAN!  
  
*inside, Chichiri stands gripping his monk's staff and praying with all his might*  
  
*Mikomi stands next to him, visibly shaken*  
  
*Yugi runs up and punches Mikomi*   
  
Mikomi: BITCH!  
  
Yugi: Where is Yue-chan?!  
  
Mikomi: *tackles Yugi*  
  
Yugi: what did you do to her?  
  
Mikomi: I don't know!  
  
Yugi: *kicks Mikomi*  
  
NM: SHE'S THE ONE WHO F**KIN' BLEW HERSELF UP! *swat smack trample kick bite gouge maul maim gore damage*  
  
Yue: *rubble begins to move and a wolf made from flame emerges* Mik-chan! Get away from Yugi!  
  
*everyone freezes*  
  
Mikomi: *grin* So . . . you made it. *draws sword* Good.  
  
*Yue-chan stumbles forward* Back off, Mik-chan.  
  
Chichiri: *drops the shield* can't do any more, no da . . . .  
  
*knocks Chichiri away* beat it monk  
  
Mikomi: -.-******* *battle ki blazes* Don't . . . touch . . . my . . . monk . . . . . *cue techno battle music* ((^.^))  
  
Yue: *fire burns brighter* then don't....touch...Yugi...  
  
Mikomi: HE STARTED IT!  
  
Yue: *charges forward and melts Mikomi's sword*  
  
Mikomi: HEY! I like that sword!  
  
Yue: YOU STARTED IT! I WAS DRIVING! *blasts Mik-chan with fire*  
  
Mikomi: *curls into a ball, thankful for fire-proof armor*  
  
Yue: *flicks Mikomi aside* I haven't the time for this. Yugi, lets go  
  
NM: *falls to the ground* Weakling . . . . Coward . . . . *louder* COWARD!  
  
Yue: *turns to Mik-chan, then grabs Chichiri* If you want the monk to live I suggest you shut up  
  
NM: Keh. You have to hide behind hostages and magical powers.  
  
Yue: *rises up on two feet into a towering giant*  
  
NM: some warrior you are . . face-to-face, hand-to-hand, you wouldn't stand a chance  
  
Yue: magic needs just as much skill, baka  
  
NM: of course it does and besides . . . . *ki begins to blaze*  
  
Yue: *begins to glow*  
  
NM: You can't possibly live with a monk as long as I have and not learn something  
  
Yue: oh really?  
  
NM: really *grins dangerously*  
  
Yue: a monk is no match for a goddess, and neither are you  
  
NM: *raises an eyebrow* Aren't I? *ki blasts Yue*  
  
Yue: *blocks ki blast* Nice try *opens mouth and gets ready to eat Chichiri*  
  
NM: Oh no you don't  
  
Yue: *swallows the monk*  
  
NM: *leaps into the air, swings and slices Yue's head off*  
  
Yue: *head grows back*  
  
Yue: mmmmmm....that was good.....  
  
*Chichiri falls to the ground*  
  
Yue: *snaps him back up*  
  
NM: Oh, regeneration, even!  
  
Yue: fool! I am fire! fire cannot be cut!  
  
NM: Damnit . . . . . *eyes narrow, which is a sure sign that some serious ass-whooping is about to occur* *raises one hand to the sky* I call upon the four winds and the spirits of my ancestors.  
  
Yue: *eyes also narrow* careful, you kill me and your monk dies for sure  
  
NM: *eyes blaze red* I know  
  
Yue: so, to kill me kills Chichiri, are you sure you want that to happen?  
  
NM: Hail to the guardians of the watchtowers of the east . . . guardians of the dawn and the rising sun . . . I call upon thee and invoke the name of my ancestor . . .  
  
Yue: *starts to glow in preparation of an attack*  
  
NM: CHAKURA! *a bolt of lightning streaks down out of the sky and strikes the ground next to Mikomi*  
  
Yue: *blinks unnervingly* oooohhhh....scary  
  
*a tall girl with pure white hair rises out of the crater, power crackling at her fingertips*  
  
NM: Yue . . . meet Chakura. Mate of Sesshoumaru and the most powerful sorceress who ever lived.  
  
Chakura: You called me, child. What's the problem.  
  
Yue: *growls* I'm so scared. Go ahead, kill me and the monk, we are one being as of now, and whatever happens to me, happens to him  
  
NM: *points to Yue* She ate Chichiri.  
  
Yue: If I am killed and scattered to the winds, so is he, regardless of this one's magic  
  
Chakura: *taps chin thoughtfully* This does pose a bit of a problem.  
  
Mikomi: Indeed  
  
Yue: *becomes larger* I am the Goddess of Fire, and no sorceress can destroy me!  
  
Chakura: *ears perk* Goddess, you say?  
  
NM: Have you an idea?  
  
Chakura: I do indeed.  
  
Yue: I'll kill Chichiri myself, that's a good idea. flame is always reborn  
  
NM: O.O** DON'T YOU DARE!  
  
Yue: *grins* say good bye Mikomi *takes a deep breath and extinguishes herself*  
  
Chakura: *mutters something under her breath*  
  
Yue: *vanishes in a puff of smoke*  
  
NM: *also mutters something under her breath . . . which is sure to be very foul*  
  
Chakura: . . . protect the soul by the power of the dawn. RISING SUN! *a brilliant white light blazes*  
*human yue-chan appears seconds later, quite confused*  
  
*the point of Mikomi's sword is at her throat in less than a second*  
  
NM: Where . . . is . . . he?  
  
Yue: @.@ What did I do????  
  
NM: *frowns grimly* Choose your words wisely. They may be your last.  
  
Yue: -.-;;;;; NANI???  
  
NM: I'm only going to ask this once more. Where is Chichiri.  
  
Yue: WHAT DID I DO? *starts to cry* 


	4. Episode Four: Trouble Arises Part two

Yue: *crying* What are you talking about! I was tied up in the garage by this creature when I went to get the station wagon!  
  
NM: *raises an eyebrow* Why . . . do i not believe you?  
  
Yue: Next thing I know I'm here and you want to kill me!  
  
Aoi: Well, can ya blame her? that fire-goddess-creature thingy just ate Chichiri!  
  
Yue: Miroku, sweetie, what is going on? *cries louder*  
  
Miroku: I wish i knew . . . *hugs Yue-chan*  
  
Yue: what fire-goddess-thingy?  
  
NM: You mean you don't know.  
  
Yue: *hides behind Miroku, afraid of Mik-chan's sword*  
  
Yue: No, I don't! I told you!  
  
NM: You must be more convincing than that, child.  
  
Yue: I AM SERIOUS! WWWWWAAAAAHHHHH! Besides! I am a water elemental! I hate fire!  
  
NM: Last chance . . . . *lifts sword, points it straight at Yue* Where. Is. Chichiri.  
  
Yue: *shows NM a water kanji* I couldn't control fire if my life depended on it I. Don't. Know!  
  
NM: Very well, have it your way. . . *prepares to strike*  
  
*fire demon suddenly appears*  
  
*everybody freezes*  
  
Yue: Told you so!  
  
*except Mikomi, who suddenly looks more pissed off than should be humanly possible* TEME!  
  
Fire demon: Stupid sorceress! You kept me from dying!  
  
Chakura: I hope you realize that I only kept you from dying to save the life of another  
  
Fire Demon: *growls at Chakura*  
  
*Chakura stands her ground*  
  
Chakura: You don't frighten me, demon.  
  
Fire Demon: Well, I'll just have to eat another then, won't I? *eyes Yue* You'll make a good snack. Just like the monk did  
  
Chakura: Remember, I'm married to a youkai. There's not much that fazes me.  
  
NM: -.-******** Bitch . . . .  
  
Yugi: that wasn't a smart thing to say...  
  
Yue: No kidding *gets out from behind Miroku* Fire hates water you know  
  
NM: *gets a suspicious-looking glitter in her eye* I don't care. I don't care if you kill me. I WILL destroy you.  
  
Yue: Wait, NM!  
  
Chakura: We need another elemental, Mik-chan.  
  
NM: Very well. *raises hand to the sky again* *thunder rumbles in response*  
  
NM: I call upon the four winds and the spirits of my ancestors . . .  
  
Yue: *raises her own hand to the sky and starts whispering a spell of her own, and a blue aura appears around her*  
  
NM: Hail to the guardians of the watchtowers of the north . . . guardians of the wind and rain. I call upon thee and invoke the name of my ancestor . . . HISUI!  
  
Yue: I call upon the oceans deep, lend me your strength to fight this beast!  
  
*the heavens open and a stream of frothing white water flows down from the sky, coalescing in the form of a girl with snow-white skin, bright turquoise eyes, and angel wings*  
  
Hisui: How's that for an entrance?  
  
*blue aura surrounds Yue and turns into a large sword* Pretty good, I have a way to get Chichiri back *points sword at Fire Demon.* We want Chichiri back!  
  
Fire Demon: so what?  
  
Hisui: *slides into battle stance with her staff held forward and two fingers at her mouth* Now.  
  
Fire Demon: I don't feel like it...  
  
Hisui: *raises an eyebrow, making her look very much like NM* Do tell?  
  
Yue: *attacks demon with sword, blue light emerges from the demon's chest. inside the ball of light is an unconscious Chichiri  
  
Hisui: *mutters some ancient-sounding words under her breath and a bright blue ki blast strikes the demon full force   
with the sound of crashing waves.*  
  
*Yue attacks at same time, cutting into demon's head*  
  
*Demon screams and vanishes in a hiss of steam and smoke*  
  
*the ki bubble containing the unconscious monk drifts slowly to the ground and pops*  
  
*when smoke clears Yue is lying on the ground at a very unnatural angle*  
  
*Hisui lets out a shriek as her energy dissipates and her wings vanish, leaving her sprawled on the ground in her weaker, human form*  
  
*Aoi speaks, making everyone jump* Aoi: Well, scratch one demon . . . now what?  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan!!!!  
  
Aoi: Cha-san?  
  
*Chakura does not respond, but kneels next to the fallen Yue, lays on hand on her head and begins chanting softly. A pale green glow envelopes the pair and small green bubbles circle Yue, tending to her injured ki.*  
  
Aoi: Ah. *to Yugi* That's a good sign, Yu-kun. None of them turned red. If they turn red, that means there's something they can't heal.  
  
Yugi: good  
  
*small red bubble appears*  
  
NM: you were saying?  
  
Chakura: It seems there is a small rent in the fabric of her life force. It's minor, but it's not something I can heal.  
  
Aoi: Life-threatening?  
  
Yue: *opens her eyes* why is everything black? *scared voice*  
  
Chakura: Not as of yet. But I fear if we do not find help, it may become worse in a matter of hours. *to Yue* The part of your ki being affected deals with your ability to see, Yue-chan.  
  
Yue: what does that mean? *begins to wail*  
  
Aoi: *covering her ears and shouting over the din* IT MEANS WE NEED TO REVIVE THE MONK SO HE CAN HEAL YOU! NOW STOP THAT GODAWFUL RACKET!  
  
Yue: *wails even louder* I hate the dark!  
  
Chakura: -.-; *sigh* I'm afraid there's not much I can do for her right now  
  
Yue: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO???  
  
NM: So hop to it! Revive Chichiri! And Hisui . . . she's gotta go back to protecting her world.  
  
Chakura: There's nothing I can do . . . *glances at the still-unconscious Chichiri* . . . but there's something HE might be able to do.  
  
Yue: *reaches out to throttle something and catches hold of Yugi*  
  
Aoi: O.o; ouch . . . that looks painful . . . .  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan....I...can't...breathe...  
  
Aoi: *pries Yue's fingers off of Yugi's throat* easy tiger . . .  
  
Yue: growls loudly. Where's Miroku? This has to be his fault somehow....  
  
Miroku: *hiding elsewhere . . . far away* HOW is it MY fault?!  
  
Yue: *wailing* I don't know yet but I'll think of something! *screams for Miroku* get back over here, monk!  
  
Miroku: Yes, dear?  
  
Yue: If I can't see you get to carry me. I am not going to run into things and hurt myself more.  
  
Miroku: Yes dear . . . of course  
  
Yugi: *laughs*  
  
Aoi: What could possibly be funny?  
  
Yugi: I'm not sure, just the way Yue-chan orders him around.  
  
Miroku: Sure . . . YOU think it's funny . . . . there's nothing funny about being a good husband-to-be  
  
*dead silence* then . . . .  
  
All: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAAAAA! *explosive laughter from all*  
  
*Miroku stands there looking miserable*  
  
Yue: *laughing much more softly* I don't feel very good  
  
Miroku: *hugs her* Aw, poor thing . . . .  
  
Yue: *holds onto Miroku's neck weakly* Actually, I feel down right awful...  
  
Chakura: Much as I'd like to stay and watch this disgustingly cute scene, I have a monk to heal. Excuse me. *kneels beside Chichiri and begins her chanting*  
  
Yue: *turns head towards Chichiri* so he's okay?  
  
*again with the pale green glow and the bubbles*  
  
Chakura: We'll have to see . . . oh dear. *several of the bubbles turn red*  
  
Yue: O.O  
  
NM: Oh no . . . .  
  
Yue: *can sense the red bubbles* Yugi, find my sword...  
  
Chakura: -.- We need healing, not weapons.  
  
*Yugi looks around and finds the big sword and gives it to Yue*  
  
*Yue turns towards Chakura* It is both weapon and a healing instrument. While it won't heal me, it will heal him  
  
Aoi: Ah ha . . . good thinkin' short stuff *pats Yue on the head*  
  
Chakura: *nod nod* Yoush (all right)  
  
Yue: Help me over to where Chichiri is  
  
*Miroku helps her over*  
  
Yue: *places sword above Chichiri's body and starts to whisper a spell. Blue aura surrounds her, then Chichiri*  
  
Chakura: How exactly does the sword work, Yue-san?  
  
Yue: *whispers the spell louder and pours her energy into the sword to heal Chichiri*  
  
Chakura: Ah . . . *chants in time and the glow intensifies*  
  
*aura surrounds Chichiri, then vanishes*  
  
*sword clatters to the ground as Yue faints*  
  
Aoi: -.- A light show . . . great.  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan, are you alright?  
  
Yue: x.x  
  
NM: That's a "no".  
  
Yugi: I can see that....  
  
Yue: *opens eyes again and throttles Yugi*  
  
Aoi: There she is!  
  
Yue: *wails* its still dark!!!!  
  
NM: Of course it is, baka. Chich-kun hasn't healed you yet!  
  
Aoi: Speaking of whom . . . *they all look over*  
  
Chichiri: *stirs slightly and sits up, looking like he's got the mother of all hangovers* Oh . . . my aching head, no da . . .  
  
Yue: *softly* Chichiri?  
  
NM: WAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! *glomps the monk enthusiastically*  
  
Chichiri: @.@ DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Aoi: Well, looks like everything's back to normal . . . . -.-;  
  
Yue: *is very pale looking*  
  
Aoi: whether normal is good or bad, i'm not sure  
  
Chakura: *explains the situation to Chichiri* Chi-san, do you think you can manage the rest?  
  
Yue: *is very pale and fading out*  
  
Aoi: Oi, aren't you gonna stay?  
  
Chakura: My energies are severely depleted. I must return to my realm to heal myself. Farewell, minna. Good luck . . . *fades out completely*  
  
Chichiri: I suppose I should get to work, no da . . .  
  
Yue: *breathing shallow* Miroku....  
  
Chichiri: *rolls up sleeves and turns to Hisui, who is still unconscious* *green bubbles for Hisui*  
  
Miroku: Yue?  
  
Yue: *too weak to talk*  
  
*Hisui groans and sits up, shaking her head to clear the cobwebs*  
  
Yue: *passes out*  
  
Chichiri: Hi-chan, daijoubu, no da?  
  
Hisui: Daijoubu . . . help the little one . . .  
  
Chichiri: Yoush . . . *kneels next to Yue* Oh dear . . . this is bad . . . this is very bad, no da  
  
Miroku: What do you mean, bad?  
  
Yugi: help her!  
  
Chichiri: Her ki levels are very low. She drained herself too far. This may take some time.. *sits cross-legged and begins to meditate*  
  
*in a moment, Hisui joins him, taking his hand*  
  
*Yugi joins him as well*  
  
*Aoi and NM also sit down and join hands with the others*  
  
Hisui: *explains quietly* The more energy we can siphon back into her, the better. Pulling from one or two is dangerous, but from many . . . the effects are minimal.  
  
*a silvery-blue glow begins to eminate from each person in the region of the heart*  
  
*tiny threads of light flow through the air and weave themselves together*  
  
*dragon symbol on Yue's forehead begins to glow softly*  
  
*the finished strand of ki flows into the dragon symbol, causing it to glow brighter*  
  
*Yue's breaths become stronger*  
  
Chichiri: That's done it, no da. She'll be fine now. *gives his trademark neko-mask grin*  
  
Yue: *slowly opens her eyes and sits up, looking around at the crowd and the debris of what was once her truck*  
  
Aoi: welcome back  
  
Mik-chan: *returning to her more mild form* Helluva trip, wasn't it?  
  
Yue: what happened to me? Better yet, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY TRUCK?  
  
Mik-chan: Yeah, that . . . um . . . the fire demon-goddess-thingy blew it up.  
  
Yue: WHAT? My insurance don't pay for that! *groans and falls back down* Now how do we get to the mall?  
  
Mik-chan: Simple. Chich-kun?  
  
Yue: better not involve me doing anything  
  
Chichiri snaps his fingers and suddenly . . . . we're here!  
  
Yue: yay!  
  
Mik-chan: there . . whatever  
  
Yue: what were we shopping for again? *is still very confused from the energy loss*  
  
*somewhere along the way, Hisui disappeared back into her realm*  
  
Mik-chan: I have NO idea . . . .Although, they do have a pretty decent anime selection at the Suncoast Video here. wanna check it out?  
  
Yue: *taps forehead while thinking* I know it was for something important..... It had something to do with Miroku....  
  
Miroku: Tuxes, Yue-chan?  
  
Yue: No, that wasn't it.... *snaps fingers together* Baby clothes! That was it! I came for baby clothes!  
  
Yugi: say what! O.O  
  
Miroku: O.O;;; . . . B-Baby clothes?  
  
Mik-chan: O.O MIROKU! *beats Miroku over the head with a rolled up newspaper*  
  
Yue: *looks taken aback* what did I say?  
  
Mik-chan: BAD MONK!! BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD! HOW THE F**K COULD YOU GET HER PREGNANT?!   
YOU'RE NOT EVEN F**KING MARRIED YET!  
  
Miroku: @.@ Ite-te-te-te-te-te . . . .  
  
Yue: *looks very confused and close to crying*  
  
Miroku: OI, SHE AGREED TO BEAR MY CHILD! WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?  
  
Mik-chan: WAIT, YOU DUMBASS!  
  
Yue: *To Aoi* why is Mik-chan shouting at Miroku?  
  
Yugi: beats me  
  
Aoi: She's pissed at him for getting you PG before you guys got hitched.  
  
Aoi: *sly grin* So . . . how was he?  
  
Yue: *smacks Aoi* that's none of your business!  
  
Aoi: ite . . .  
  
*Mik-chan finishes beating Miroku to a bloody pulp*  
  
*he lies in a squishy little puddle on the floor*  
  
Yue: *looks at Miroku* I never said the child was his Mik-chan  
  
Miroku: @.@ Owwwww . . . .  
  
Mik-chan: O.O then, whose is it?  
  
*everyone turns to glare at Yugi*  
  
Yugi: what?  
  
Mik-chan: TEME! *flies at Yugi, wielding her newspaper*  
  
Yue: *runs from Mik-chan*  
  
Yugi: *runs from Mik-chan* Yue-chan! HELP!  
  
Yue: *uses powers to lift Yugi out of Mik-chan's reach*  
  
Yue: *to Miroku* Boy, and I thought she was harsh on you...  
  
Aoi: Yes well . . . whose child is it, any way?  
  
Yue: *smiles* wouldn't you like to know  
  
Aoi: yes i would  
  
Yue: *shakes head* no, I don't think so. *winks and nods at Yugi with her head*  
  
Mik-chan: *pauses in her pursuit of Yugi* If it's Chichiri's, you do realize I'm gonna have to kill you. . . ah . . . good  
  
Yue: Heyla! I think not!  
  
Miroku: O.O* WHAAAAAAAAAAT?! HIM?! YOU . . . WITH . . . AND . . . YUEEEEEEEEE!  
  
Yugi: It was a one night fling!  
  
Miroku: *joins Mik-chan in attempting to batter the living daylights out of Yugi*  
  
Yue: *places protective shield around Yugi*  
  
Miroku: AND EXACTLY HOW WAS IT OK FOR YOU TO LAY A HAND ON MY FIANCEE?  
  
Yue: *shouts at top of her lungs* STOP IT!  
  
*Miroku freezes*  
  
Yue: It was before we were engaged Miroku!  
  
Miroku: *looks dejected* So . . . what? You decided to foist his brat off on me?  
  
Yue: what? It wasn't intentional. Like he said, it was a one night fling, we'll have kids of our own eventually. *under breath* maybe  
  
Miroku: *eyes go wide and teary* MAYBE?!?!?!?!?!??! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *runs away crying*  
  
Mik-chan: -.-; I must say, I've never seen him do that before.  
  
Yue: *runs after miroku, then uses magic to drag him back*  
  
Miroku: I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU ALL! *glares at Yugi* AND ESPECIALLY YOU!  
  
Yue: *slaps him a few times to shut him up* YOU LISTEN NOW!  
  
Miroku: Hmph . . . maybe . . . you said maybe . . . . you're so cruel  
  
Yue: I only said maybe because I am not sure how well I will be able to have kids! After everything that's happened this one might not even make it! Didn't you think it odd that I lost so much energy, Miroku? Huh?  
  
Mik-chan: Well, that's what you get for getting engaged to someone that's even remotely like me, houshi-san.  
  
Miroku: Um . . . not really . . . . I've never actually seen that sort of thing happen before.  
  
*several people stop and stare at the bizarre tableau unfolding in the middle of the court*  
  
Yue: Well, it was because of the baby! And if you think I am going to stand for this one minute...stand for you acting like a spoiled brat when a child's life might be in danger, then you got BIG problems!  
  
Aoi: Oi, dya mind, people? Put your eyes back in your heads!  
  
Miroku: Gomen nasai, koishii . . . i didn't know . . .  
  
Yue: *gets up and brushes herself off* So apologize to Yugi. Its not his fault you know, its not anyone's fault...  
  
Miroku: Deshou ne . . . ((i suppose))  
  
Yugi: Miroku, I am sorry all this is happening to you. I didn't even know until a few days ago. Yue-chan was worried sick, you know  
  
Miroku: I'm sorry too, Yugi-san. You must admit, this is NOT the sort of thing a groom wants to hear two weeks before his wedding  
  
Yugi: I understand  
  
Miroku: Friends?  
  
Yugi: friends  
  
Aoi: *aside* If they hug, I'm gonna vomit.  
  
Yugi: I won't go that far.  
  
Aoi: *puts her Dramamine away* Good.  
  
Yue: *as if nothing ever happened* what will I name the baby?  
  
Aoi: YUGI JUNIOR! ^.^  
  
Miroku: *conks her over the head* No way.  
  
Yue: *considers the name...then glares at Miroku* Why not?  
  
Miroku: Because . . . well . . . because. . . don't i get a say in this?  
  
Yue: because...NO!  
  
Miroku: WHAT?! WHY THE F**K NOT?!  
  
Yue: BECAUSE I SAID SO! *turns into water demon*  
  
Miroku: O.O; Eep . . . *shuts up*  
  
Yue: *suddenly turns back into normal Yue and lands on her butt* What was that? *rubs forehead*  
  
Aoi: I think it was you turning into a water demon . . . but i could be mistaken . . .  
  
Yue: *all sweet and innocent* aren't we supposed to be shopping?  
  
All: -.-; . . . .  
  
Yue: *to Miroku* and the kid IS going to be called Yugi Jr.  
  
Mik-chan: Right! To Suncoast, we go! We're off to buy the anime . . . la la la la la la la la . . .  
  
Yue: Okay! *follows mik-chan*  
  
Aoi: *to Yugi, re: Mik-chan* Sometimes, it frightens me that i'm related to her*  
  
Yugi: I was afraid she was going to kill me about being the baby's father. same goes for Miroku  
  
Aoi: Yeah, she's crazy and randomly violent like that sometimes; she gets that from Hisui's side of the family. Oi,   
didja know she's related to Fluffy?  
  
Yugi: Really? How did Miroku survive so long with Mik-chan?  
  
Aoi: yep! See . . . ((as we commence the long and tedious genealogy segment))  
  
Yugi: *nods understandingly*  
  
Aoi: I dunno how he survived . . . but then, he got to hide behind the couch a lot.  
  
Yugi: Hey, where did Yue-chan go? *Yue-chan has vanished from sight*  
  
Aoi: Damnit, they walked off without us! And i have no idea where the Suncoast place is.  
  
Yugi: Just Yue-chan is gone  
  
Aoi: Hmm . . . odd . . . .  
  
Yugi: *looks around* Where could she have gone? She was right here.  
  
Aoi: Away. Where else do people go when they disappear?  
  
Yugi: In Yue-chan's case, I don't know. Think another demon got her?  
  
Aoi: I doubt it  
  
Yugi:then where would she be?  
  
*flashover to scene where Yue-chan is tied up in a corner of a store*  
  
Aoi: oh great . . . . this again  
  
*two gremlins appear and start dragging her away*  
  
Mik-chan: *duct taped to a wall next to Yue* OI! GET BACK HERE! WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH US, ANYWAY?!  
  
*the guys are nowhere in sight*  
  
*Yue struggles against the ropes and manages to kick a gremlin and pull free*  
  
*sees Yugi in the crowd*  
  
*he spots her and runs over, followed by everyone else*  
  
Yugi: *unties Yue-chan*  
  
Yue: what took you so long?  
  
Mik-chan: Um, excuse me . . . *everyone ignores her*  
  
*Yugi blushes and steps back* s-s-sorry Yue-chan... We couldn't find you  
  
Yue: you call that a reason?  
  
Mik-chan: Um, hello? Little help here?  
  
Aoi: Well, you kinda disappeared into thin air. That's a damned hard trail to follow!  
  
*Yugi shakes his head* Besides, Miroku refused to move  
  
Miroku: *pouts*  
  
*Yugi whispers* he's still upset about the baby. *louder* so what's with the gremlins?  
  
Aoi: Beats me.  
  
*pats Miroku's head* Stop pouting. Lets get going. I'm hungry  
  
Mik-chan: HELLO! I'M TAPED TO A F**KING WALL HERE!  
  
Aoi: Me too. Let's chow!  
  
Yugi: so am I  
  
Lets get ice cream  
  
Aoi: Yay! ^.^ 


	5. Episode Five: Adventure in the Mall part

Mik-chan: WHY AM I STILL TAPED TO THIS F**KING WALL?! DAMNIT, TURN ME LOOSE! BEFORE I GET ANGRY!  
  
Yue: *turns around* OOPS! Yugi, untie Mik-chan  
  
Mik-chan: *eyes glow interesting colors*  
  
Yue146 : Yugi: why do I have to do it?  
  
Mik-chan: Because yue said so  
  
Yue: because I said so  
  
Mik-chan: and if you don't, i'll bite you . . . and I WILL, too!  
  
Yugi: *goes over and unties mik-chan, then runs*  
  
Miroku: oh, she will . . . believe me . . . .  
  
Mik-chan: MWAHAHHAHAHAAA! FREE AT LAST!  
  
Yugi: see you at the ice cream shop  
  
Mi-chan: FLEE YOU FOOLISH MORTAL! *chases Yugi*  
  
Yue: *pulls mik-chan back* let him be  
  
Mik-chan: Aw, you're no fun . . . *pout pout pout*  
  
Yue: You can have some fun later  
  
Mik-chan: I was just taped to a frickin' wall for twelve hours, i gotta chase SOMEONE!  
  
Yue: Chase Miroku  
  
Mik-chan: *turns to the houshi with a slightly demented grin* Oh Miroku-chaaaaaaaaaan . . . .  
  
Miroku: O.O; Keep away from me you schizo! *runs like h-e-double hockey sticks*  
  
Mik-chan: RESISTANCE IS FUTILE!  
  
Aoi: i reiterate, sometimes I'm scared that we share the same DNA.  
  
*Yugi reappears behind Yue-chan with ice cream*   
  
Yugi: here you go. Is it safe?  
  
Yue: for you it is  
  
Mik-chan: *tackles Aoi* Is that any way to speak to your mother? *gives her a thorough noogie-ing*  
  
Aoi: Ite-te-te-te-te . . .  
  
Yue: maybe not later though  
  
Yugi: great  
  
*a small mother-daughter cat fight ensues*  
  
Aoi: *reads that line* Wait a minute . . .  
  
*Yue and Yugi back away*   
  
Yue: lets go look at clothes   
  
Yugi: good idea  
  
Aoi: Mik-chan, you're not actually my mother, you know. You're my ancestor  
  
Mik-chan: *cocks head to the side like a confused puppy* Eh?  
  
Yue: *watches interestedly* Confused Mik-chan = big trouble  
  
Aoi: Well, cause, see . . . you and Kenshin . . . or rather NM and Kenshin . . . they, um . . . yeah . . . a LONG, LONG time ago . . . and here I am!  
  
Mik-chan: Nizûno-san and Kenshin did THAT?! *wrinkles nose* EEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!  
  
*Yue and Yugi back away quietly*  
  
Aoi: 'Fraid so.  
  
Mik-chan: Hm . . . that explains a lot  
  
Aoi: Such as?  
  
Mik-chan: Nothing YOU need to know . . . *slightly hentai grin*  
  
*Yue smacks Mik-chan*  
  
Mik-chan: Ite! What was that for?!  
  
Yue: No hentai around me!  
  
*little gremlin scrambles across the floor*   
  
Yugi: there goes your friend, Mik-chan.  
  
Mik-chan: O.O Sonuva . . . . .  
  
Yugi: *laughs nervously*  
  
Mik-chan: *chases after the gremlin* GET YOUR SCALY LITTLE BUTT BACK HERE! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE RUNNING THE BUS, DOGGONE IT!  
  
Yugi: The bus? *confused look* What bus?  
  
Aoi: *as Mik-chan tears like heck after the gremlin* Ah, yes . . . you see, the Ghetto Bus is operated by little gremlins running on hamster wheels rather than a normal engine. Saves on gas money.  
  
Yugi: Oh. what an odd way to run a machine. What if the gremlins get tired?  
  
Aoi: They go on strike and we end up at the mall. ((See Eps. 7-9))  
  
Yugi: Then who runs the bus? Miroku? *evil grin*  
  
Aoi: Heck no! He's just a passenger.  
  
Yugi: Darn. That would have been funny.  
  
Yue: Yugi doesn't know about the Bus.  
  
Aoi: It's Mik-chan's bus. She dreamed it up (literally) and she owns it. Just look at the tag line she puts in her emails:  
Nizûno Mikomi  
Creator, Owner, and Proprietor  
The Continued Adventures of the Blue Psychedelic Ghetto Bus of DOOM Doom doom  
  
*Yue and Yugi: *both laugh*  
  
*Yue starts to walk away from the group*  
  
Mik-chan: And just where are you going?  
  
Yue *no answer, keeps walkin*  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan?  
  
Miroku: Honey? Where are you going? You're not leaving without me, are you?  
  
Yue: *turns around with blank look on her face*  
  
Miroku: Is that a yes?  
  
*Yue's eyes are glowing a blue/grey color*  
  
Yugi: That's...not normal.  
  
Aoi: *whose eyes commonly do just that* It isn't?  
  
*energy ball appears and Yue throws it at Yugi*  
  
Aoi: *jumps back* OI! That's not nice!  
  
Yugi: Ite!  
  
Yue: *aims another at Miroku*  
  
Miroku: O.O WHAT DID I DO?! *hides behind Mik-chan*  
  
Yue: *another blank look and shoots at Mik-chan*  
  
Mik-chan: Sure let me take the hit . . . baka houshi  
  
Yue: *turns to Chichiri*  
  
Mik-chan: *hops out of the way and lets the blast fry the unfortunate Miroku*  
  
Mik-chan: oro? Nani kore . . . (what's this?)  
  
Yue: *creates another energy ball and gets ready to throw*  
  
Mik-chan: HEEEEEE-YIPE! YUE-CHAN, HAVE YOU LOST WHAT'S LEFT OF YOUR MIND?! WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU DOING?!  
  
Yue: *throws ball at Chichiri*  
  
Chichiri: DAAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Yue: *looks around the mall and starts to walk into the first shop*  
  
Aoi: Ok, NOW I'm confused . . .  
  
Yue: *starts to glow*  
  
Yugi: *gets up* Yue-chan?  
  
Yugi: Miroku, do something!  
  
Mik-chan: She'd better not wreck the place or I'm gonna be POed  
  
Miroku: LIKE WHAT? YOU'RE THE FATHER OF HER CHILD! YOU DO SOMETHING!  
  
Yugi: I don't know! She's your fiancé! *growls* fine *tackles Yue-chan to the floor*  
  
Mik-chan: *sweatdrops and throws a curtain up in front of them* Don't do that here!  
  
Yugi: *very mad* Mik-chan! A little help would be nice! She's trying to kill me! *Yue has her hands around Yugi's throat*  
  
Mik-chan: WHAT?! YOU'RE the one who threw her down on the floor! In public no less! Oh that . . . well then . . .  
  
*before Mik-chan can do anything Yue passes out and wakes up normal ...sort of*  
  
Mik-chan: *rolls up her sleeve and plucks Yugi out of harm's way, just in case Yue goes berserk again* Happy?  
  
Yue: what's going on?  
  
Aoi: Oh boy, here we go again  
  
Yue:*very confused* How did I get back in the mall? Better question. Why am I on the floor and why is Yugi hiding behind Mik-chan?  
  
Mik-chan: Perhaps it's because his hand is on my butt . . . kindly remove that before I remove it from your wrist.  
  
Yugi: that's not me!  
  
Mik-chan: -.- HOUSHI!  
  
Yugi: *glares at Miroku* Don't get me in trouble!  
  
Miroku: *snatches his hand away and looks innocent* Who . . . ME?!  
  
Yue: *glares at Miroku*  
  
Miroku: *big wide innocent eyes* 


	6. Episode Six: Adventure in the Mall part

Yue: *crying* What are you talking about! I was tied up in the garage by this creature when I went to get the station wagon!  
  
NM: *raises an eyebrow* Why . . . do i not believe you?  
  
Yue: Next thing I know I'm here and you want to kill me!  
  
Aoi: Well, can ya blame her? that fire-goddess-creature thingy just ate Chichiri!  
  
Yue: Miroku, sweetie, what is going on? *cries louder*  
  
Miroku: I wish i knew . . . *hugs Yue-chan*  
  
Yue: what fire-goddess-thingy?  
  
NM: You mean you don't know.  
  
Yue: *hides behind Miroku, afraid of Mik-chan's sword*  
  
Yue: No, I don't! I told you!  
  
NM: You must be more convincing than that, child.  
  
Yue: I AM SERIOUS! WWWWWAAAAAHHHHH! Besides! I am a water elemental! I hate fire!  
  
NM: Last chance . . . . *lifts sword, points it straight at Yue* Where. Is. Chichiri.  
  
Yue: *shows NM a water kanji* I couldn't control fire if my life depended on it I. Don't. Know!  
  
NM: Very well, have it your way. . . *prepares to strike*  
  
*fire demon suddenly appears*  
  
*everybody freezes*  
  
Yue: Told you so!  
  
*except Mikomi, who suddenly looks more pissed off than should be humanly possible* TEME!  
  
Fire demon: Stupid sorceress! You kept me from dying!  
  
Chakura: I hope you realize that I only kept you from dying to save the life of another  
  
Fire Demon: *growls at Chakura*  
  
*Chakura stands her ground*  
  
Chakura: You don't frighten me, demon.  
  
Fire Demon: Well, I'll just have to eat another then, won't I? *eyes Yue* You'll make a good snack. Just like the monk did  
  
Chakura: Remember, I'm married to a youkai. There's not much that fazes me.  
  
NM: -.-******** Bitch . . . .  
  
Yugi: that wasn't a smart thing to say...  
  
Yue: No kidding *gets out from behind Miroku* Fire hates water you know  
  
NM: *gets a suspicious-looking glitter in her eye* I don't care. I don't care if you kill me. I WILL destroy you.  
  
Yue: Wait, NM!  
  
Chakura: We need another elemental, Mik-chan.  
  
NM: Very well. *raises hand to the sky again* *thunder rumbles in response*  
  
NM: I call upon the four winds and the spirits of my ancestors . . .  
  
Yue: *raises her own hand to the sky and starts whispering a spell of her own, and a blue aura appears around her*  
  
NM: Hail to the guardians of the watchtowers of the north . . . guardians of the wind and rain. I call upon thee and invoke the name of my ancestor . . . HISUI!  
  
Yue: I call upon the oceans deep, lend me your strength to fight this beast!  
  
*the heavens open and a stream of frothing white water flows down from the sky, coalescing in the form of a girl with snow-white skin, bright turquoise eyes, and angel wings*  
  
Hisui: How's that for an entrance?  
  
*blue aura surrounds Yue and turns into a large sword* Pretty good, I have a way to get Chichiri back *points sword at Fire Demon.* We want Chichiri back!  
  
Fire Demon: so what?  
  
Hisui: *slides into battle stance with her staff held forward and two fingers at her mouth* Now.  
  
Fire Demon: I don't feel like it...  
  
Hisui: *raises an eyebrow, making her look very much like NM* Do tell?  
  
Yue: *attacks demon with sword, blue light emerges from the demon's chest. inside the ball of light is an unconscious Chichiri  
  
Hisui: *mutters some ancient-sounding words under her breath and a bright blue ki blast strikes the demon full force   
with the sound of crashing waves.*  
  
*Yue attacks at same time, cutting into demon's head*  
  
*Demon screams and vanishes in a hiss of steam and smoke*  
  
*the ki bubble containing the unconscious monk drifts slowly to the ground and pops*  
  
*when smoke clears Yue is lying on the ground at a very unnatural angle*  
  
*Hisui lets out a shriek as her energy dissipates and her wings vanish, leaving her sprawled on the ground in her weaker, human form*  
  
*Aoi speaks, making everyone jump* Aoi: Well, scratch one demon . . . now what?  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan!!!!  
  
Aoi: Cha-san?  
  
*Chakura does not respond, but kneels next to the fallen Yue, lays on hand on her head and begins chanting softly. A pale green glow envelopes the pair and small green bubbles circle Yue, tending to her injured ki.*  
  
Aoi: Ah. *to Yugi* That's a good sign, Yu-kun. None of them turned red. If they turn red, that means there's something they can't heal.  
  
Yugi: good  
  
*small red bubble appears*  
  
NM: you were saying?  
  
Chakura: It seems there is a small rent in the fabric of her life force. It's minor, but it's not something I can heal.  
  
Aoi: Life-threatening?  
  
Yue: *opens her eyes* why is everything black? *scared voice*  
  
Chakura: Not as of yet. But I fear if we do not find help, it may become worse in a matter of hours. *to Yue* The part of your ki being affected deals with your ability to see, Yue-chan.  
  
Yue: what does that mean? *begins to wail*  
  
Aoi: *covering her ears and shouting over the din* IT MEANS WE NEED TO REVIVE THE MONK SO HE CAN HEAL YOU! NOW STOP THAT GODAWFUL RACKET!  
  
Yue: *wails even louder* I hate the dark!  
  
Chakura: -.-; *sigh* I'm afraid there's not much I can do for her right now  
  
Yue: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO???  
  
NM: So hop to it! Revive Chichiri! And Hisui . . . she's gotta go back to protecting her world.  
  
Chakura: There's nothing I can do . . . *glances at the still-unconscious Chichiri* . . . but there's something HE might be able to do.  
  
Yue: *reaches out to throttle something and catches hold of Yugi*  
  
Aoi: O.o; ouch . . . that looks painful . . . .  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan....I...can't...breathe...  
  
Aoi: *pries Yue's fingers off of Yugi's throat* easy tiger . . .  
  
Yue: growls loudly. Where's Miroku? This has to be his fault somehow....  
  
Miroku: *hiding elsewhere . . . far away* HOW is it MY fault?!  
  
Yue: *wailing* I don't know yet but I'll think of something! *screams for Miroku* get back over here, monk!  
  
Miroku: Yes, dear?  
  
Yue: If I can't see you get to carry me. I am not going to run into things and hurt myself more.  
  
Miroku: Yes dear . . . of course  
  
Yugi: *laughs*  
  
Aoi: What could possibly be funny?  
  
Yugi: I'm not sure, just the way Yue-chan orders him around.  
  
Miroku: Sure . . . YOU think it's funny . . . . there's nothing funny about being a good husband-to-be  
  
*dead silence* then . . . .  
  
All: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAAAAA! *explosive laughter from all*  
  
*Miroku stands there looking miserable*  
  
Yue: *laughing much more softly* I don't feel very good  
  
Miroku: *hugs her* Aw, poor thing . . . .  
  
Yue: *holds onto Miroku's neck weakly* Actually, I feel down right awful...  
  
Chakura: Much as I'd like to stay and watch this disgustingly cute scene, I have a monk to heal. Excuse me. *kneels beside Chichiri and begins her chanting*  
  
Yue: *turns head towards Chichiri* so he's okay?  
  
*again with the pale green glow and the bubbles*  
  
Chakura: We'll have to see . . . oh dear. *several of the bubbles turn red*  
  
Yue: O.O  
  
NM: Oh no . . . .  
  
Yue: *can sense the red bubbles* Yugi, find my sword...  
  
Chakura: -.- We need healing, not weapons.  
  
*Yugi looks around and finds the big sword and gives it to Yue*  
  
*Yue turns towards Chakura* It is both weapon and a healing instrument. While it won't heal me, it will heal him  
  
Aoi: Ah ha . . . good thinkin' short stuff *pats Yue on the head*  
  
Chakura: *nod nod* Yoush (all right)  
  
Yue: Help me over to where Chichiri is  
  
*Miroku helps her over*  
  
Yue: *places sword above Chichiri's body and starts to whisper a spell. Blue aura surrounds her, then Chichiri*  
  
Chakura: How exactly does the sword work, Yue-san?  
  
Yue: *whispers the spell louder and pours her energy into the sword to heal Chichiri*  
  
Chakura: Ah . . . *chants in time and the glow intensifies*  
  
*aura surrounds Chichiri, then vanishes*  
  
*sword clatters to the ground as Yue faints*  
  
Aoi: -.- A light show . . . great.  
  
Yugi: Yue-chan, are you alright?  
  
Yue: x.x  
  
NM: That's a "no".  
  
Yugi: I can see that....  
  
Yue: *opens eyes again and throttles Yugi*  
  
Aoi: There she is!  
  
Yue: *wails* its still dark!!!!  
  
NM: Of course it is, baka. Chich-kun hasn't healed you yet!  
  
Aoi: Speaking of whom . . . *they all look over*  
  
Chichiri: *stirs slightly and sits up, looking like he's got the mother of all hangovers* Oh . . . my aching head, no da . . .  
  
Yue: *softly* Chichiri?  
  
NM: WAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! *glomps the monk enthusiastically*  
  
Chichiri: @.@ DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Aoi: Well, looks like everything's back to normal . . . . -.-;  
  
Yue: *is very pale looking*  
  
Aoi: whether normal is good or bad, i'm not sure  
  
Chakura: *explains the situation to Chichiri* Chi-san, do you think you can manage the rest?  
  
Yue: *is very pale and fading out*  
  
Aoi: Oi, aren't you gonna stay?  
  
Chakura: My energies are severely depleted. I must return to my realm to heal myself. Farewell, minna. Good luck . . . *fades out completely*  
  
Chichiri: I suppose I should get to work, no da . . .  
  
Yue: *breathing shallow* Miroku....  
  
Chichiri: *rolls up sleeves and turns to Hisui, who is still unconscious* *green bubbles for Hisui*  
  
Miroku: Yue?  
  
Yue: *too weak to talk*  
  
*Hisui groans and sits up, shaking her head to clear the cobwebs*  
  
Yue: *passes out*  
  
Chichiri: Hi-chan, daijoubu, no da?  
  
Hisui: Daijoubu . . . help the little one . . .  
  
Chichiri: Yoush . . . *kneels next to Yue* Oh dear . . . this is bad . . . this is very bad, no da  
  
Miroku: What do you mean, bad?  
  
Yugi: help her!  
  
Chichiri: Her ki levels are very low. She drained herself too far. This may take some time.. *sits cross-legged and begins to meditate*  
  
*in a moment, Hisui joins him, taking his hand*  
  
*Yugi joins him as well*  
  
*Aoi and NM also sit down and join hands with the others*  
  
Hisui: *explains quietly* The more energy we can siphon back into her, the better. Pulling from one or two is dangerous, but from many . . . the effects are minimal.  
  
*a silvery-blue glow begins to eminate from each person in the region of the heart*  
  
*tiny threads of light flow through the air and weave themselves together*  
  
*dragon symbol on Yue's forehead begins to glow softly*  
  
*the finished strand of ki flows into the dragon symbol, causing it to glow brighter*  
  
*Yue's breaths become stronger*  
  
Chichiri: That's done it, no da. She'll be fine now. *gives his trademark neko-mask grin*  
  
Yue: *slowly opens her eyes and sits up, looking around at the crowd and the debris of what was once her truck*  
  
Aoi: welcome back  
  
Mik-chan: *returning to her more mild form* Helluva trip, wasn't it?  
  
Yue: what happened to me? Better yet, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY TRUCK?  
  
Mik-chan: Yeah, that . . . um . . . the fire demon-goddess-thingy blew it up.  
  
Yue: WHAT? My insurance don't pay for that! *groans and falls back down* Now how do we get to the mall?  
  
Mik-chan: Simple. Chich-kun?  
  
Yue: better not involve me doing anything  
  
Chichiri snaps his fingers and suddenly . . . . we're here!  
  
Yue: yay!  
  
Mik-chan: there . . whatever  
  
Yue: what were we shopping for again? *is still very confused from the energy loss*  
  
*somewhere along the way, Hisui disappeared back into her realm*  
  
Mik-chan: I have NO idea . . . .Although, they do have a pretty decent anime selection at the Suncoast Video here. wanna check it out?  
  
Yue: *taps forehead while thinking* I know it was for something important..... It had something to do with Miroku....  
  
Miroku: Tuxes, Yue-chan?  
  
Yue: No, that wasn't it.... *snaps fingers together* Baby clothes! That was it! I came for baby clothes!  
  
Yugi: say what! O.O  
  
Miroku: O.O;;; . . . B-Baby clothes?  
  
Mik-chan: O.O MIROKU! *beats Miroku over the head with a rolled up newspaper*  
  
Yue: *looks taken aback* what did I say?  
  
Mik-chan: BAD MONK!! BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD! HOW THE F**K COULD YOU GET HER PREGNANT?!   
YOU'RE NOT EVEN F**KING MARRIED YET!  
  
Miroku: @.@ Ite-te-te-te-te-te . . . .  
  
Yue: *looks very confused and close to crying*  
  
Miroku: OI, SHE AGREED TO BEAR MY CHILD! WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?  
  
Mik-chan: WAIT, YOU DUMBASS!  
  
Yue: *To Aoi* why is Mik-chan shouting at Miroku?  
  
Yugi: beats me  
  
Aoi: She's pissed at him for getting you PG before you guys got hitched.  
  
Aoi: *sly grin* So . . . how was he?  
  
Yue: *smacks Aoi* that's none of your business!  
  
Aoi: ite . . .  
  
*Mik-chan finishes beating Miroku to a bloody pulp*  
  
*he lies in a squishy little puddle on the floor*  
  
Yue: *looks at Miroku* I never said the child was his Mik-chan  
  
Miroku: @.@ Owwwww . . . .  
  
Mik-chan: O.O then, whose is it?  
  
*everyone turns to glare at Yugi*  
  
Yugi: what?  
  
Mik-chan: TEME! *flies at Yugi, wielding her newspaper*  
  
Yue: *runs from Mik-chan*  
  
Yugi: *runs from Mik-chan* Yue-chan! HELP!  
  
Yue: *uses powers to lift Yugi out of Mik-chan's reach*  
  
Yue: *to Miroku* Boy, and I thought she was harsh on you...  
  
Aoi: Yes well . . . whose child is it, any way?  
  
Yue: *smiles* wouldn't you like to know  
  
Aoi: yes i would  
  
Yue: *shakes head* no, I don't think so. *winks and nods at Yugi with her head*  
  
Mik-chan: *pauses in her pursuit of Yugi* If it's Chichiri's, you do realize I'm gonna have to kill you. . . ah . . . good  
  
Yue: Heyla! I think not!  
  
Miroku: O.O* WHAAAAAAAAAAT?! HIM?! YOU . . . WITH . . . AND . . . YUEEEEEEEEE!  
  
Yugi: It was a one night fling!  
  
Miroku: *joins Mik-chan in attempting to batter the living daylights out of Yugi*  
  
Yue: *places protective shield around Yugi*  
  
Miroku: AND EXACTLY HOW WAS IT OK FOR YOU TO LAY A HAND ON MY FIANCEE?  
  
Yue: *shouts at top of her lungs* STOP IT!  
  
*Miroku freezes*  
  
Yue: It was before we were engaged Miroku!  
  
Miroku: *looks dejected* So . . . what? You decided to foist his brat off on me?  
  
Yue: what? It wasn't intentional. Like he said, it was a one night fling, we'll have kids of our own eventually. *under breath* maybe  
  
Miroku: *eyes go wide and teary* MAYBE?!?!?!?!?!??! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *runs away crying*  
  
Mik-chan: -.-; I must say, I've never seen him do that before.  
  
Yue: *runs after miroku, then uses magic to drag him back*  
  
Miroku: I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU ALL! *glares at Yugi* AND ESPECIALLY YOU!  
  
Yue: *slaps him a few times to shut him up* YOU LISTEN NOW!  
  
Miroku: Hmph . . . maybe . . . you said maybe . . . . you're so cruel  
  
Yue: I only said maybe because I am not sure how well I will be able to have kids! After everything that's happened this one might not even make it! Didn't you think it odd that I lost so much energy, Miroku? Huh?  
  
Mik-chan: Well, that's what you get for getting engaged to someone that's even remotely like me, houshi-san.  
  
Miroku: Um . . . not really . . . . I've never actually seen that sort of thing happen before.  
  
*several people stop and stare at the bizarre tableau unfolding in the middle of the court*  
  
Yue: Well, it was because of the baby! And if you think I am going to stand for this one minute...stand for you acting like a spoiled brat when a child's life might be in danger, then you got BIG problems!  
  
Aoi: Oi, dya mind, people? Put your eyes back in your heads!  
  
Miroku: Gomen nasai, koishii . . . i didn't know . . .  
  
Yue: *gets up and brushes herself off* So apologize to Yugi. Its not his fault you know, its not anyone's fault...  
  
Miroku: Deshou ne . . . ((i suppose))  
  
Yugi: Miroku, I am sorry all this is happening to you. I didn't even know until a few days ago. Yue-chan was worried sick, you know  
  
Miroku: I'm sorry too, Yugi-san. You must admit, this is NOT the sort of thing a groom wants to hear two weeks before his wedding  
  
Yugi: I understand  
  
Miroku: Friends?  
  
Yugi: friends  
  
Aoi: *aside* If they hug, I'm gonna vomit.  
  
Yugi: I won't go that far.  
  
Aoi: *puts her Dramamine away* Good.  
  
Yue: *as if nothing ever happened* what will I name the baby?  
  
Aoi: YUGI JUNIOR! ^.^  
  
Miroku: *conks her over the head* No way.  
  
Yue: *considers the name...then glares at Miroku* Why not?  
  
Miroku: Because . . . well . . . because. . . don't i get a say in this?  
  
Yue: because...NO!  
  
Miroku: WHAT?! WHY THE F**K NOT?!  
  
Yue: BECAUSE I SAID SO! *turns into water demon*  
  
Miroku: O.O; Eep . . . *shuts up*  
  
Yue: *suddenly turns back into normal Yue and lands on her butt* What was that? *rubs forehead*  
  
Aoi: I think it was you turning into a water demon . . . but i could be mistaken . . .  
  
Yue: *all sweet and innocent* aren't we supposed to be shopping?  
  
All: -.-; . . . .  
  
Yue: *to Miroku* and the kid IS going to be called Yugi Jr.  
  
Mik-chan: Right! To Suncoast, we go! We're off to buy the anime . . . la la la la la la la la . . .  
  
Yue: Okay! *follows mik-chan*  
  
Aoi: *to Yugi, re: Mik-chan* Sometimes, it frightens me that i'm related to her*  
  
Yugi: I was afraid she was going to kill me about being the baby's father. same goes for Miroku  
  
Aoi: Yeah, she's crazy and randomly violent like that sometimes; she gets that from Hisui's side of the family. Oi,   
didja know she's related to Fluffy?  
  
Yugi: Really? How did Miroku survive so long with Mik-chan?  
  
Aoi: yep! See . . . ((as we commence the long and tedious genealogy segment))  
  
Yugi: *nods understandingly*  
  
Aoi: I dunno how he survived . . . but then, he got to hide behind the couch a lot.  
  
Yugi: Hey, where did Yue-chan go? *Yue-chan has vanished from sight*  
  
Aoi: Damnit, they walked off without us! And i have no idea where the Suncoast place is.  
  
Yugi: Just Yue-chan is gone  
  
Aoi: Hmm . . . odd . . . .  
  
Yugi: *looks around* Where could she have gone? She was right here.  
  
Aoi: Away. Where else do people go when they disappear?  
  
Yugi: In Yue-chan's case, I don't know. Think another demon got her?  
  
Aoi: I doubt it  
  
Yugi:then where would she be?  
  
*flashover to scene where Yue-chan is tied up in a corner of a store*  
  
Aoi: oh great . . . . this again  
  
*two gremlins appear and start dragging her away*  
  
Mik-chan: *duct taped to a wall next to Yue* OI! GET BACK HERE! WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH US, ANYWAY?!  
  
*the guys are nowhere in sight*  
  
*Yue struggles against the ropes and manages to kick a gremlin and pull free*  
  
*sees Yugi in the crowd*  
  
*he spots her and runs over, followed by everyone else*  
  
Yugi: *unties Yue-chan*  
  
Yue: what took you so long?  
  
Mik-chan: Um, excuse me . . . *everyone ignores her*  
  
*Yugi blushes and steps back* s-s-sorry Yue-chan... We couldn't find you  
  
Yue: you call that a reason?  
  
Mik-chan: Um, hello? Little help here?  
  
Aoi: Well, you kinda disappeared into thin air. That's a damned hard trail to follow!  
  
*Yugi shakes his head* Besides, Miroku refused to move  
  
Miroku: *pouts*  
  
*Yugi whispers* he's still upset about the baby. *louder* so what's with the gremlins?  
  
Aoi: Beats me.  
  
*pats Miroku's head* Stop pouting. Lets get going. I'm hungry  
  
Mik-chan: HELLO! I'M TAPED TO A F**KING WALL HERE!  
  
Aoi: Me too. Let's chow!  
  
Yugi: so am I  
  
Lets get ice cream  
  
Aoi: Yay! ^.^ 


End file.
